


It's Not Cheating When You Love Her

by Afonso



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Endgame Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, F/F, I am Supercorp Trash, Jealous Kara Danvers, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, Lena Luthor throws her genius mind at the problem, Lena Luthor throws money at the problem, POV Kara Danvers, Pre-Relationship, Romantic Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, SuperCorp, Supergirl throws her powers at the problem, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, karlena, side sanvers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-28
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2020-05-28 11:58:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 27,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19393666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Afonso/pseuds/Afonso
Summary: Oneshots: All the ways Lena spoils Kara/apologises in ways that only a billionaire can (because she just #doesntcare especially when Kara is involved), and how Kara does the same with her powers.





	1. It's Not Jealousy When You're Just Friends

**Author's Note:**

> Felicity is not with Oliver in this story.

Flash and the Arrow need Kara’s help, and they’ve come to Kara’s Earth. Kara ropes Lena in when even the S.T.A.R. labs geniuses _and_ Felicity Smoak cannot come up with a way to track down the enemy. Lena saves the day using proprietary L-Corp technology and her crazy-high IQ. When their cities are once again safe, someone suggests a celebratory drink at the alien bar. Lena makes her excuses, but Kara insists, especially since the CEO has no plans on a Friday night. For the fourth Friday in a row. It’s not pity, Kara explains, more of the fact that a beautiful woman should not be working late on a Friday night. Said beautiful woman should go out and have some fun after a hard week’s work. Lena relents with an indulgent grin, her eyes seeming to glow even greener. “You’re my favourite.” 

Kara teases, “Who? Kara Danvers or Supergirl?”

“Both, but Kara more than Supergirl,” Lena grins and squeezes her hand. Kara revels in Lena’s touch as the billionaire’s hand lingers on hers for just one second, and then she lets go.

Kara makes sure that Lena is sitting next to her all night, as opposed to other people...like Felicity Smoak. Kara likes Felicity a lot, admires her intellect and pure-hearted nature, but whenever she sees Lena working closely with Felicity, something churns in Kara’s gut. Especially when they build theory together or get excited during scientific discussions. They also continued working together for many hours after the crisis was resolved. Kara has no idea why her gut reacts that way on seeing her two friends interact, only that she has a bad feeling about it and anyway, why shouldn’t she stick to her best friend for one whole night? Speaking of, the alien observes that her favourite human seems to be holding back from drinking too much, insisting on nursing the same glass of merlot for the whole night. Kara is puzzled - surely she’s not afraid she can’t hold her drink? Lena’s jet-black hair is down today - the way Kara prefers it, a straight, smooth and coconut-smelling curtain, and Kara parts some of it to whisper in her best friend’s ear. “Don’t worry about getting drunk - I’m seeing you home after this anyway, make sure you get home safe.” Lena half-smiles, half-winces back at her and says, “I’m more worried about saying or doing things I shouldn’t.”

“Don’t. You never embarrass yourself,” Kara says reassuringly. Lena squeezes Kara’s arm in gratitude, but continues to sip slowly at her drink.

The moment Felicity finishes an intense conversation with Barry about crop circles, Lena strikes up a conversation with her. They start talking about the latest research in astrophysics, and that feeling in Kara’s stomach is back again, especially when she sees how passionate the two women are about the topic. The stab in her gut intensifies when she notices, for the first time, how beautiful Felicity is, with those deep dimples and that adorable smile. Judging by how much Lena is smiling, she is willing to bet her bottom dollar that Lena has also noticed. She huffs and tugs at Lena’s arm after letting them go on for 30 minutes. “Lena, you must be tired after such a long day. Let’s get you home.” Lena looks a little puzzled - it’s not like the mild-mannered reporter to interrupt a conversation. 

Kara turns to Felicity with a guilty smile, “Sorry to interrupt! Girl’s had a long day, and I’m in charge of her welfare.” Kara dips her head, cringes at her lame proclamation and fake laugh as she grabs Lena’s bag. Felicity smiles warmly at Kara and Lena, flashing said dimples, and says, “No worries. Things to do, I understand. Don’t let me get in the way.” She winks at the two of them. 

Kara tilts her head in confusion, but Lena seems to catch on immediately. “No no, Felicity, it’s not like that.” 

The younger blonde flushes, hands leaping up to her mouth. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I thought - nevermind.” 

Lena pulls the still-confused Kara away as she bids a hasty goodbye to Felicity and the rest of the gang. Alex catches Kara’s eye, clocks the younger Danvers’ flustered face, and motions for Kara to call her when she gets home. Kara nods as she exits the bar, Lena on her arm. She’s still puzzled about what Felicity said but more importantly, Lena is no longer talking to Felicity and the feeling in her gut is gone.

Kara makes to unbutton her shirt and change into her Supergirl costume, but Lena puts a halting hand over the Kryptonian’s fingers. “I don’t feel like flying today, Kara. Let’s take a ride to my place instead. My driver’s just outside.”

Kara nods, and they get in the car. She feels the warmth of Lena’s thigh right next to hers, and smiles when the other woman makes no move to scoot away from her in the cavernous backseat. And then her cheeks flush, and she wonders vaguely if it is unusual to have such thoughts about one’s best friend. After a moment’s pause, Lena asks, softly, “Do you not like it when I talk to Felicity?”

 _Shit._ “Who, me?” Kara giggles unconvincingly, pointing lamely at herself.

Lena continues, her eyes searching Kara's face, emerald penetrating blue. “It’s just that you always have this angry look on your face when I talk to her. You have that same look when Alex steals your potstickers. Did you and Felicity have some sort of disagreement?” Kara gets a strange but pleasant sensation in her chest when she sees Lena’s eyes widening with concern.

 _Ok, honesty is the best policy_ , Kara decides. “No...Felicity - she’s awesome. Not a food thief. I just get this...twisty feeling in my gut whenever I see you talk to her. I don’t know why. It was really intense just now and I just really had to get you away,” Kara dips her head now, feeling ashamed. Lena doesn’t often get the chance to enjoy a conversation with another human of equal intellect and she has just robbed her of it. “I don’t know why. Just something about her being so pretty and you two having so much in common makes me feel really annoyed for some reason. Sorry for interrupting your conversation, Lena. God, that was really childish of me.” Kara covers her burning face with her hands, shaking her head.

“Kara, look at me.” She is taken aback when she feels Lena’s fingers gently lifting her chin up to look into her viridian eyes. “Kara, I need you to tell me. Were you...jealous?” Lena is biting her lip, looking like she already regrets asking the question. But Kara can see something else glimmering in Lena’s eyes. Something that looks like...hope?

“Jealous?” Kara asks, her voice rising in pitch until it’s a squeak. Why would she be jealous? And then the puzzle pieces she has been sliding around in her head for the past few months click into place. Each piece is a vague feeling, a nagging thought that there was something _different_ about her and Lena’s friendship, that she couldn’t put her finger on. They are no longer a mish-mash of random cut-up images. Now, they form one, very clear, undeniable image. “Oh.” Kara takes a deep breath, holds Lena’s surprised, exquisite face in both of her hands, and kisses her reply. Her lips land hard against Lena's, and burn with possessiveness and longing. After a pause, Lena responds hungrily, fervently. She tastes like wine, and peaches, and best of all, requited love.

* * *

They spend the entire weekend together. Lena admits that she had been trying to make Kara jealous by talking to Felicity, ever since she noticed Kara’s stolen-pot-stickers look the first time they interacted. It had been a shot in the dark - after all, filling her office with flowers and buying CatCo hadn’t worked. Kara acts furious and throws popcorn at her. “You...you evil Luthor! Do you know how uncomfortable jealousy is, especially when you don’t even know why?” 

“Sorry, darling, will you forgive me?” Lena looks chastised. “I’ll think about it.” Kara pretends to be mad while Lena’s arms encircle her from the back, and the CEO kisses her cheek tenderly.

Lena explains that she had been crushing hard on Kara since the second month of their friendship. Kara confesses that she had been clueless about her own feelings until Lena’s jealousy question. “I just kept wanting to spend more and more time with you, and be next to you, but I didn’t stop to think why.” She tells Lena about James’ strange bemusement when Lena had sent her flowers and bought CatCo, and how she cannot believe she is only understanding it now. 

“My silly girl,” Lena says indulgently, giving her newly minted girlfriend another kiss.

“I am _not_ silly! Just very, _very_ unfamiliar with Earth’s dating customs. To prove how _not silly_ I am, I will tell you which fact you _and_ Felicity got wrong during your conversation last night.” Kara huffs and folds her arms.

“Ok, darling, do tell,” Lena asks, smirking.

“The Higgs-Boson particle does not give other particles mass,” Kara says matter-of-factly.

Lena’s perfectly-plucked eyebrows shoot up so high that they almost disappear into her hair. 

“What? Then what does?”

“I’m not going to tell you. It’s a _Kryptonian secret_.”

“Please! It’ll bring my research to a whole new level!”

“Nope,” Kara says, popping the “p”, thoroughly enjoying having the upper hand, and Lena’s adoring gaze upon realising that she’s so much smarter than she lets on. Serves Lena right for falling for her dumb blonde act.

“Wait till I tell Felicity,” Lena takes out her phone.

“No! I’ll heat-vision it, I swear!” Kara looks deadly serious.

Lena laughs and keeps her phone in her pocket, safe from her jealous little alien.

The rest of the weekend passes too quickly. Hours float by while they talk and make out and cuddle, drunk on new love, the simple wonder and the sweet, sweet relief of finally being in each other’s arms. 

* * *

On Monday, Kara shows up late at the office, thanks to a 15-minute-long goodbye kiss at Lena’s apartment. She giggles at the memory as the elevator door opens at her floor. 

Kara is surprised to see Felicity next to her desk, deep in conversation with Winn. “Kara, hi!” 

“Hey Winn. Hi Felicity!” Kara goes in for a hug, genuinely happy to see her and feeling guilty again for cutting short her conversation with Lena for nothing. “I thought you went back to your Earth yesterday,” Kara whispers. Felicity returns her hug warmly, and says, “Let’s go to someplace private and I’ll explain.”

Ignoring Winn’s “help me get this hot girl’s number” mime, Kara walks away with Felicity. They find an empty meeting room. “Lena asked for my help to explain some...things...to you. She gave me L-Corp’s proprietary accelerated healing technology - that’s worth $200,000 by the way, so it’s an offer I couldn’t refuse - she insisted, but of course, I was also so happy to help.” Kara smiles patiently, remembering that Felicity could be just as rambly as her. She wonders vaguely if Lena has a type. “Sorry, I’m rambling. So! She wanted you to know that the reason why we were working so closely together was for this.” She hands Kara a piece of smooth metal that looks like a futuristic mouse. “If you press that button, this becomes a Kryptonite full-body shield armour. We’re hoping it’ll help your...alter ego...out of many tight spots.” Felicity grins excitedly, her nerdiness showing through. 

“Thank you so much. And I’m so sorry again for interrupting.” Kara bites her lip.

Felicity grins. “No problem. And just so you know, I already have...someone...kind of. So you don’t need to worry about Lena. Besides, I would never dream of breaking up such a perfect couple - called it the moment I saw you two together.” Felicity winks. “And you know what’s the kicker?”

Kara grins and looks down on the floor, feeling bashful. _Perfect couple._ “What?” 

“The whole time we were working together, she couldn’t stop talking about you.”


	2. It's Not A Matter of Getting Used To

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara makes Lena late for work with her powers of seduction. She makes up for it with her actual powers.

New relationships are unfamiliar to Lena. Lena is still getting used to waking up toasty and fuzzy and so, so, safe in her favourite alien’s arms. Rousing from the kind of uninterrupted, deep and restful slumber which has evaded her for years. She has yet to grow accustomed to having breakfast together, watching and laughing as her beautiful blonde shoves an insane amount of food into her mouth. Laughter is another unfamiliar thing. Sometimes she finds she’s been grinning so much that her face hurts. 

She definitely has not adjusted to having to actually _leave_ Kara after 10 hours together, for the next 12 hours. The thought makes her pout as the two women get ready to go to work. She has never thought about retirement before, but right now it seems really tempting. Speaking of enticing things, Kara is taking her pajama top off right now.

“Kara, what are you doing?” Lena asks, amused, lustful.

“Changing.” Lena catches the smirk on Kara’s face.

“No, you’re not, you’re seducing me. I know you can do it super-fast so that I won’t see anything.”

“Aren’t you whiny on this fine morning,” Kara remarks casually as she continues her little striptease, moving on to her pajama pants next.

Kara had her back to her, but the blonde turns around now, throwing Lena a devilish smile. Lena stops breathing when she sees the ab muscles rippling on her girlfriend’s stomach, in the full glory of the sun instead of under moonlight, as she is growing accustomed to seeing them. Lena is also pretty sure Kara is clenching her muscles just a little bit, to show off. Not that they would be unnoticeable otherwise. Quite the opposite, really. Anyone who has tried kissing them should know.

“Kara…” Lena hears an uncharacteristic whine in her own voice but she can’t control it.

“Yes?” Another flash of that evil grin.

Kara super-speeds to Lena’s side and before she’s even blinked twice, the brunette finds herself tossed carelessly on the bed, and Kara is nothing but a telltale blur and a series of the most delicious caresses _everywhere_ on her body, almost simultaneously.

When Kara’s done teasing her, Lena exacts her revenge. Very successfully.

Lena curses when she next looks at the clock. “Shit, I can’t be late for this meeting!” She dresses at an almost inhuman speed while Kara helps with her make-up in super-speed. If Lena had time to pause, she would certainly find the sight of Supergirl doing her makeup extremely funny.

“I have a proposition.” The naughty smirk on Kara’s face is back.

“No, Kara, we can’t go again, I really can’t be late - sorry.” She smiles apologetically, longingly, at her girlfriend.

“No, it’s to get you there on time. Especially since it’s my fault that you’re running late. Do you trust me?”

“Yes,” Lena answers immediately.

The very next second, Lena is hovering outside Kara’s window, with Kara’s arms wrapped firmly around her, the tightness of them betraying Kara’s protectiveness. Instead of looking down, she distracts herself by admiring the shape of Kara’s biceps and the cotton-candy clouds whizzing past them as Kara flies them towards L-Corp. She plants a “chaste” kiss on Kara’s lips (it is only chaste compared to what they were doing back home) and whispers, “Thank you. This is pretty scary, though.”

“Let me distract you then.”

Kara holds her even closer and locks her lips with Lena’s, and for the next few seconds, Lena feels as though someone has reached into her heart and turned on all the lights.

It is a very, very good distraction. So good that Kara overshoots L-Corp by five blocks.

But Lena is not complaining, especially since she still makes it on time for her meeting. As she takes her seat at the head of the table, Lena wonders when she’ll ever get used to having a superhero and her equally amazing alter ego as her lover. And the mid-air make-out sessions she comes with. Probably never.


	3. It’s Not Just A Friendly Gesture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A very short fluffy one. Kara's POV on what happened on the day she found her desk overflowing with flowers from one Lena Luthor.

The first time Kara realised that her new friend is kind of over-the-top was the day she arrived at CatCo and couldn't see the top of her desk because it was covered in flowers. "Oh, great, you're here, ma'am, I'll need you to sign off on these...as soon as I bring up the rest." The delivery guys were panting after their 10th trip from the loading bay. "There are more?" Kara stared at her cubicle in disbelief. There was literally no more space on Kara's desk and some of the flowers had already been placed on the floor. Kara's morning brain fog cleared a little and she checked the nearest bouquet for a note.

"I can't thank you enough, but hopefully this is a start. Also, lunch today? -Lena" Somehow, reading her name made Kara's skin tingle. She quickly texted Lena.

**To: Lena Luthor**

**OMG Lena you really shouldn't have. And yes to lunch! I'll come over.**

"Kara, why do you look as though someone just gave you a lifetime supply of pizza?" James chuckled.

Kara’s cheeks turned crimson. "Erm, do I? No no, it's just,  _ Lena _ , she's so  _ over the top _ ." Kara forced a laugh to hide how flustered she was becoming.

James glanced at the note that Kara was still holding in her hand. "Oh." He raised his eyebrows, and then laughed heartily before wagging his finger at Kara with a knowing smile and walking away. Kara was puzzled by his reaction. She re-read the note a few times, and slipped it into her bag carefully, just because it smelled like Lena's perfume. 


	4. It’s Not Only Good For Business

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another short one based on a canon event. This time - the CatCo acquisition, from Lena's POV. Hope y'all like it! :)

The frown Kara is wearing as she walks into Lena’s office bothers the CEO, tugs at the brunette’s heartstrings. “Can you try to convince Morgan Edge not to buy CatCo?” The blonde reporter pleads, dread clouding her features at the thought of her beloved company falling into the hands of the villainous Edge. Lena knows talking to that human vermin is a lost cause, but nods her head anyway, powerless to refuse. If she’s being honest with herself, she has been a slave to that face shortly after Kara first walked into her life. 

Lena tries, she really does, but despite her best efforts, the small, small man does not budge. A notion is forming in her mind, and though her inexperience scares her, the more she thinks about it, about how it would cheer Kara up  _ and _ protect her reputation, the more she likes the idea. Her mind lingers on how her solution would make Kara, who has been so sad since Mon-El’s departure, grin again. She makes her decision.

* * *

“I bought CatCo,” Lena tells Kara nervously, biting her lip. She’s proud of her decision, knows it was a good business move, but she is worried about Kara’s reaction. She wishes so much to see that trademark Sunny Danvers smile again, and now she is anxious about whether Kara would instead be uncomfortable with having Lena as her boss. Lena is annoyed with herself for not having considered that possibility until this very moment,  _ when she’s just told Kara _ .

Kara’s face lights up, and internally, Lena lets out a relieved sigh. “ _ Lena _ ,” Kara says in what Lena assumes is supposed to be a scolding tone, but the journalist can’t keep the grin off her face, so it ends up sounding indulgent instead. Lena likes how her name sounds like music when Kara says it. “But I just quit before coming here.”

“Then un-quit! How often do you get to work with your best friend?” Lena cajoles, her tone teasing but her eyes looking into Kara’s with a lot more hope than Lena would care to admit.

“Great point. Ok, I’ll un-quit CatCo, on one condition,” Kara says, the corners of her mouth twitching in the playful way that Lena has sorely missed.

“Anything,” Lena answers, with feeling.

“ _ You _ have to hire me back,  _ boss,”  _ Kara says, and then chuckles as though it’s the best joke she’s ever made.

“Done.” Lena eye-smiles at Kara until she realises that she has been holding the blonde’s gaze for too long, lost in that sea of warm blue. She breaks the silence with a smirk, green eyes sparkling. “Double pay, just because I can, and you deserve it.” The reporter does her aww-shucks smile, and Lena’s heart does its aww-Kara somersault. 

* * *

When Kara tells James that Lena has acquired CatCo and is technically their new boss, her friend smirks and looks at Kara for a long time, as though expecting her to say something further. 

“What?” Kara asks. “Is there something on my face?”

“Oh my God, you really don’t realise it,” James chuckles, shaking his head.

“Realise what?” It was the second time James was acting like he knew something that Kara didn’t, and it was starting to annoy her.

James just laughs and shakes his head. “Nevermind.” He winces when Kara smacks him on the shoulder. “Tell me!”

But James only says with a wink, “You’ll know when the time comes,” and ignores the blonde while she huffs in frustration.


	5. It’s Not Unfair If She Started It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara gets herself into trouble after relating how she peeked at Kate Kane's tattoos with her powers during the Elseworlds crossover.

“So, I x-rayed her to see where all the tattoos are,” Kara says triumphantly.

“You  _ what _ ?” Lena’s voice is unusually high-pitched.

“Only because she made me so curious!” 

“Let me see how this Kate Kane looks like,” Lena says, launching Google on her phone, a deep furrow between her brows. “Damn,” Lena’s face falls as the first pictures load.

“What’s wrong?” Kara’s eyes are wide with concern. Her eyes are mesmerising, and the colour reminds Lena of waves lapping in the sea, tickling her and Kara’s entwined bodies as she looked into these same eyes during their last vacation. It’s a relaxing memory. But she shakes her head to clear her mind, pulls herself back to the pressing matter at hand.

“I-she’s  _ hot _ ,” Lena says, jaw tight with the effort of trying to find the words to express what she’s feeling. “And you basically saw her naked.” 

Kara’s hand leaps to her mouth, and she looks guiltily at her girlfriend, at that mouth with its pulled-down corners, and strokes Lena’s cheek with her thumb. “I’m sorry, baby, I swear it’s not like that, just-I wasn’t thinking, and I was just curious. And I swear, I avoided _some parts_!”

Self-doubt and slight jealousy flash across Lena’s face, battling for dominance. Kara watches as Lena takes command of her facial features, wrestles them into neutrality. Kara has seen Lena do this so many times - at the board room when the members undermine her, in front of people who don’t trust her, when talking to her mother. Kara’s heart aches a little whenever Lena feels the need to hide her emotions in front of her. Lena conjures up a small smile, and says, “It’s nothing, I’m overreacting,” and gets up to get a headstart on cooking dinner. Kara knows that this signals the end of the conversation for Lena - at least, for now.

As they eat dinner, Kara updates Lena about the articles she’s been working on. Lena listens attentively, gives a few helpful sources. She appears to have put the Kate Kane conversation out of her mind. But Kara knows better. And she has an idea about what to do.

They watch a movie together, Kara embracing Lena from start to end, playing with her silky dark hair, while she waits for Lena’s dinner to digest. Personally, she is ready for another round of ice-cream. But human metabolism works at a different speed. Once the credits roll, Kara wraps her arms tighter around Lena and says, “Close your eyes, and don’t open them until I tell you it’s okay, okay?”

Lena looks at her in confusion, then smiles affectionately back at her sweet little Kryptonian. She thinks of all the romantic gestures she’s done already in the short months they’ve been together. “Another surprise, huh? Ok, I’ll play along.” Lena smirks, lips twitching. 

Kara flies as fast as she can to her favourite spot - somewhere she has only ever been on her own. She is so ready to share it with the most important person in her life.

They reach their destination in 5.15 seconds - possibly a new personal record for Kara. Once there, Kara plants Lena carefully on the ground, feet-first, and whispers, “Not yet.”

She reaches into the backpack she had brought along, pulls out a picnic mat and the warm, soft blanket of Kara’s that Lena loves so much. She always says it makes her feel like nothing bad can ever happen to her when she’s wrapped in it.

She guides Lena into a sitting position at the best angle, embraces her and wraps the blanket around the both of them. She feels Lena relax immediately into the soft fabric. She tugs the blanket snugly around Lena, keeping the chill out, because Lena gets cold easily, even for a human. “Open your eyes, darling,” Kara whispers, breathing in the delicious scent of Lena’s coconut shampoo, and softly kissing her cheek. 

Kara watches as green eyes widen at the sight of a million twinkling lights in National City below them, and the stars above them. They are on top of the highest mountain in National City, in a spot that is inaccessible to anyone who cannot fly. The stars look so close that Kara feels as though she could reach out and touch them. It was the main reason why she loved this place so much. Here, she always feels at peace. She can see her beloved city below her, savour the peaceful knowledge that the people in it are safe for the time being. She can look up at Krypton’s fading star, relive happy memories in her head and grieve a little - in complete privacy.

Kara’s placed Lena at the best vantage point - where you can see the city below without being too close to the edge. 

“It’s breathtaking,” Lena whispers. “But why did you take me here?”

Kara places her hands on the sides of Lena’s face, gazes deeply into her eyes. “Breathtaking. Exactly. This is how you make me feel. There is no one else who has ever made me feel this way. All the Kate Kanes in the world aren’t going to change that.” Lena would giggle at the cheesiness of her words if Kara wasn’t saying it with utter conviction, her usually smiley face uncharacteristically serious.

“I’m sorry, baby. I really was just curious,” Kara dips her head and looks up at Lena. 

Lena kisses Kara, thinking it absolutely adorable and also a bit tear-jerking that Kara would do this just to prove a point.

“No more abusing your powers - for curiosity or otherwise,” Lena says, in mock seriousness.

“Never again,” Kara swears, her expression still solemn.

“Again? Wait a minute...did you know about my tattoos  _ before _ we-?”


	6. It's Not Expensive If It's for Kara

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Maggie take things into their own hands for the hapless almost-couple one Game Night.

The clock has just crawled past 11pm on a Friday night, and the Super Friends have drunk themselves into a pensive sort of ecstasy. The humans’ choice of poison tonight is a $10,000 bottle of scotch (courtesy of their favourite rich friend) and the aliens’, Aldebaran rum (courtesy of their favourite daughter of Mars). They are basking in the soft, flickering glow of alcohol, in a comfortable silence.

There is nowhere else in the universe that Kara would rather be at this moment. She looks to her left: Lena, eyes half-closed and giggly (the youngest female billionaire in the world - _giggly!_ ). To her right: Alex, looking deeply into Maggie's eyes as they smile at each other as though there is no one else in the room. Kara's heart is filled with so much affection for these people, that she suddenly feels tearful. She blames the rum.

This is the calm before the storm. 

"Right!" Maggie sits up straight with a clap. Her palms don't quite meet, and Alex chuckles at the sight.

"Now that everyone's nice and high, it's time for the grand finale of the evening." Maggie nods at Alex.

Kara looks round as all her friends straighten up from their various half-drunk slumps, suddenly attentive.

"For today's truth or dare, we decided to spice it up a little."

Alex reaches into her backpack and takes out a black tentacled thing with a flourish. “A baby truth-seeker. We just confiscated it from a black market merchant before coming here. It’s due back in the DEO tomorrow morning, so be gentle.”

“Kara, since you came in last at Scrabble, you go first,” Maggie teases.

“Fine with me.” Kara sticks her tongue out at Maggie, gets up and sashays over to Alex in a display of bravado.

“Truth or dare?”

“Truth, always.” Kara plants her hands on her hips, Supergirl-style. Alex rolls her eyes at her sister’s theatrics.

Everyone is looking at Kara now, and her heartbeat spikes when she feels a smouldering green pair of eyes on her. Alex places the baby truth seeker on Kara. The blonde giggles as its soft tentacles wrap around her right arm. It feels surprisingly ticklish even though it looks slimy.

The older Danvers’ face is dead serious as she asks, “Do you have a crush on someone in this room?”

Her blush betrays her even before she gives her answer.

“Yes,” she whispers, and her heartbeat escalates further as her blue eyes involuntarily meet the only green pair in the room. Lena’s pale face turns beet red.

Maggie and Alex collapse into laughter, and the rest of the Super Friends join in, clapping the two very red ladies on the back.

“It’s Lena’s turn next,” Alex the self-proclaimed game master announces with ill-disguised glee.

Lena steps forward bashfully, stands next to Kara, who appears to be rooted to the ground and fascinated with Alex’s parquet floor. An alabaster hand shyly seeks out and grabs a sunkissed one, holds on tight. The blonde immediately intertwines her fingers with Lena’s and squeezes back, lifting her head up briefly to flash a retarded, thousand-watt smile at Lena before looking down again.

“You two look like preschoolers at a playground,” Maggie teases as she transfers the truth seeker to Lena. The creature’s onyx contrasts sharply with Lena’s light skin. Lena shrinks from the cold touch as it wraps its tentacles around her.

Maggie is giggling so much that she can hardly get the question out of her mouth. “What’s your response to Kara?” 

There is a pause as Lena takes a deep breath. J’onn, M’gann, Winn and James look on, rapt, eating popcorn as fast as they can.

Lena’s touch is so gentle, as though she’s afraid she would hurt the superhero, as she lifts Kara’s chin to look into her deep blue eyes. The warm light in Alex’s living room makes her best friend’s features look even softer, kinder, and her heart squeezes.

“I have been irrevocably in love with you for months now.” Kara’s eyes fill with tears.

“I keep making up reasons to see you, but it’s never enough,” Lena sighs, and Kara has never seen the powerful woman look so helpless.

Alex and Maggie exchange high-fives, matching big grins on their faces.

“We came up with this idea when the truth seeker came in. You two idiots have been practically dating without realising it for the longest time, and we got tired of waiting to see who would win the bet.”

“Alex!” Kara glares, but the effect of it is muted by her still-flushed face.

“Don’t be mad, Kara. This is me, giving my blessing.” Now, Alex looks like she’s about to cry too, and the petite detective bolts to the table to grab tissue and comfort the love of her life.

“I’ll get you back for this,” Kara mock-scolds her favourite couple, and then looks at Lena with wonder. Months of pining, of wondering what would happen if she put their friendship on the line for something more. Could she really be Lena’s from tonight onwards? Her eyes trace Lena's jawline, her cheekbones, hewn from stone by the most dedicated artisan, and she wonders how anyone can look _like thi_ s. Her lips seek out Lena’s of their own accord, and when they meet, she realises that this moment was always inevitable.

When the wolf whistles die down, Kara and Lena excuse themselves, Kara leading the CEO by the hand to Alex’s bedroom.

“Don’t do anything weird in there!” Alex warns, fear creeping into her voice.

Kara gives her sister her best evil smirk and ducks into the room, closes the door.

Lena reaches into the pocket of her sharply-cut royal purple blazer. Kara notices how it hugs all of her curves deliciously. Lena pulls out a navy blue, satiny box that is almost as big as her palm.

“I read up on this topic,” Lena starts nervously, the colour high on her cheeks again. “And, erm, you don’t have to wear it, I just thought it‘d be nice - anyway it’s only the closest thing I could have made here on earth without the Bal’loran rock that can only be found on Krypton, but-” Kara cuts her off, strokes Lena’s face affectionately. “You’re rambling. That’s kind of my job,” she teases. “I don’t even know what it is but I’m already sure I’ll love it because I love all your gifts. And I’ll wear it every day, just to feel close to you.”

Lena smiles, relieved, and opens the box.

It is a necklace strung with tiny, shimmering green and blue beads, and the House of El crest in the middle.

Kara’s hand leaps to her mouth. “Lena, this is...this is beautiful. And it looks way, way too expensive.” She grabs both of Lena’s hands. “You shouldn’t have, Lena.”

Lena shakes her head dismissively. “You’re worth more. Best $20,000 I ever spent,” she quips, flashing that sexy smirk that always kindles Kara’s desire.

“You read up on Kryptonian dating customs?” Kara asks, her voice breaking as the sweetness of the gesture hits her. It’s so Lena.

Lena nods. “I wanted to do this right. I had it done on impulse, thought I’d never get to use it. I’ve been carrying it around. Makes me feel...safe...somehow.” She takes a deep breath, and asks with shiny eyes, “Will you be my girlfriend?”  
“You don't know how long I've waited to hear that,” Kara breathes, launches herself at her new beau, thanking Rao that she no longer has to hold herself back from kissing Lena anymore.

They don’t emerge from Alex’s bedroom for the next hour, ignoring the redhead’s increasingly traumatised voice demanding to know what they are doing inside. "Not on my bed, Kara, please!"

Kara thinks it is the best form of revenge.


	7. It's Not Over Until I Say It Is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler alert: Pls hold off on reading this if you haven’t watched the last episode of season 4.
> 
> Kara apologises every day, in different ways, after Lena finds out she’s Supergirl. Dramatic angst but happy ending guaranteed.

Day 1

“Lena, you’re with me, right?” Kara had asked on the first Game Night after Lena’s heart stopped feeling anything. 

“Always.” Lena had replied automatically, surprising herself.

She lasts only an hour before she makes her excuses and leaves. It’s too hard, out-pretending pretenders. As usual, Kara gets up to walk her to her car. She lets the Kryptonian do it, because it will be the last time. In the lift, Lena turns to Kara and says, in a flat tone, “Before he died, Lex told me you’re Supergirl.”

She does not look at Kara when she walks out of the lift. Lena does not turn back as she says, “Stay the _fuck_ away from me.” She hates that her voice cracks.

///

Day 2

Lena smashes her glass on the only framed picture in her office - one of her with the Super Friends. She feels first satisfaction, then breathlessness because there is now a crack over Kara’s face and _she can’t see Kara’s face properly_. She is annoyed to find that she is feeling things again. She fixes it by finishing the entire bottle of whiskey, then sending Jess out for more.

Jess calls Kara, but for the first time, the reporter turns down a Lena SOS request.

///

Day 3

She wakes up in her office, empty whiskey bottle still in hand. There seems to be a giant clamp on her head and it is squeezing her brains out of her ears. Her neck hurts, and for one blissful moment, it is the only source of pain. Then, she remembers that the woman she had hoped against hope would be hers someday had lied to her every single fucking day since they met. The serrated dagger in her chest twists, and twists and twists. The answer is more whiskey. She glances at her shelf. Empty. Jess has defied her orders for the first time.

Blind rage overcomes Lena, until she Luthors it into a box in her head labelled “things to ignore”.

She fires up her computer. Work is her only loyalty. She should have kept it that way. She swallows hard against the bile rising in her throat, the tears threatening to fall.

Although, who can she blame, really? She should never have believed that she was worthy of love and trust.

That night, she is so deep in the valley of alcohol-fueled oblivion that she does not feel it when a blur of blue and red picks her up gently, brings her up, up, and away. Lena is sleeping too deeply to feel wet drops falling carelessly on her top as, next to the Luthor’s chest, a Kryptonian heart breaks.

///

Day 4

She opens her eyes to a new day, another migraine and 5 texts from Kara. Somehow, she is in bed although she fell asleep in the office. She deletes the first 3 messages without reading, and has the remaining 2 memorised. She smirks bitterly at herself. What would Mother think?

**I’m sorry. It’s not what you think. Let me explain. Please.**

**Talk to me, Lena. Please. I’m so sorry.**

Lena can’t reply. If she does, her whole body would smash into bits and disappear. She knows this with absolute certainty.

///

Day 5

Supergirl is on TV. She does not switch it off. Kara’s hair lacks lustre, and she is actually hunching - something Kara only does when gravely injured. The superhero’s mind seems to be elsewhere, her face heavy with sorrow. Lena feels satisfied. Because she is the kind of person that is satisfied when she sees her ex-crush hurting.

Today, there are only 3 texts from Kara. She’ll give up soon. One of them is a picture of a kitten with humongous eyes saying “I’m sorry”. The wetness on her face is nothing. She is not running out of waterproof makeup.

///

Day 6

There are no new messages from Kara. Not that Lena is checking. Luthors don’t pine.

///

Day 7

Lena goes home for the first time in 3 days. She has to pick up 20 bouquets of roses to clear a path to the front door. She checks the delivery note: these came yesterday. She does not fill up a vase with water and stick 5 of the roses inside. She does not think about calling Kara.

She surprises herself with the realisation that she now hates Lex more than she loathes herself.

After working for 12 hours straight on her couch, she shuffles to the bedroom, bone-tired. She falls asleep. 

She does not dream of an ethereal blonde giving her a kiss on the cheek with trembling lips soft as clouds. 

///

Day 8

Lena’s face is wet when she rouses, but she does not think it is from her own tears. She thinks back to the dream. She does not replay the kiss sequence. Luthors do not believe in impossible things such as a Super crying for a Luthor.

On the empty space next to her on the bed, plumeria petals spell out SORRY.

///

Day 14

Lena is not watching Supergirl fighting a 10-foot-tall alien on TV. She is not biting her lip at the unfocused look in Supergirl’s eyes, her defeated posture, how she’s not fighting back as hard as she usually does.

Lena does not desperately type out a text that reads:

**You do not get to die on me before explaining. Tomorrow night, 10pm, my place.**

The Luthor does not pump her fist in the air when Supergirl absurdly takes out her phone in the middle of a fight, face lighting up as she punches the bewildered alien to next Tuesday.

///

Day 15

Lena stops pretending to be focusing on her work at 6pm, packs up her things.

She tries to work again at home but her keyboard is slick from her sweaty palms and she keeps stopping to wring her hands. She scolds herself. _What are you so nervous about? You’re not the one doing the explaining._ She looks at the clock. 8pm.

There is a soft thud on her balcony.

“You’re early.”

Kara gives a small, nervous smile. “So are you.”

Lena frowns. She’s not ready for jokes.

Supergirl raises her palms in panic. “I’m sorry! Bad joke. Bad Kara.”

The superhero’s arms fall to her sides, and she stares at the floor.

“Was it because I’m a Luthor?” Lena smiles bitterly, green eyes full of pain.

“My cousin and I are literally the ones who put your family in prison. They did evil things, but I know you love them still. Whether or not it was our fault, the fact is that we added to your trauma and suffering. I can’t forgive myself for that. And I was afraid you wouldn’t, too. I am still afraid. And you have every right to hate me.“ Kara is crying, and Lena finds that even after everything, she cannot bear the sight.

“I don’t. Hate you, I mean,” Her Irish lilt creeps into her last words. Luthors stay in control. Lena takes a deep breath.

“You lied to me. Every single day since we met.” So much for control. Lena wills her tears not to fall. Kara thumbs them away, with such care that you wouldn’t believe she could lift a plane with bare hands. Lena flinches from her touch, but not for the reason that Kara thinks. The Kryptonian quickly removes her hands from Lena’s face.

_I’ve missed her touch so, so much._

“Lena, please, look at me.” Kara waits patiently until finally, viridian eyes meet hers.

“I wanted to tell you. Every single day since we became close.” Lena hears the iron conviction in Kara’s voice, lets the certainty of it wash over her like warm honey down an achy throat.

Kara continues, mistaking the dark-haired woman’s silence for disbelief. “I’m sorry. I wanted to protect you from more danger. But I was also selfish. I wanted you to see me as just Kara. I don’t get to be just Kara with anyone else.”

More silence as Lena processes, torn. 

_You can’t risk being lied to again. You can’t survive this twice._

_She’s told you the truth. She has no more secrets now. Can’t you hear it in her voice?_

_“_ I’m not like this with anyone else. Lena, please forgive me. I can’t...I can’t lose you.” 

Lena feels the wetness from Kara’s tears before she feels the blonde’s lips, soft as clouds, pressing gently on her cheek.

Kara has told Lena that she has a beautiful soul, promised again and again that she would always protect her, always be there for her.

Kara has gone above and beyond the call of friendship at every turn, saving her life, defending her against all reasoning, risking Snapper’s wrath to write fluff pieces.

Kara has, on countless occasions, held Lena together by the sheer fierceness of her embrace, while Lena fantasised that the taller woman never wants to let go, too.

But Kara has never kissed her, not even on the cheek.

Luthors don’t forgive. _No_ , another voice in her head answers, _you’re not that type of Luthor._ The voice is bright as the sun. For the first time in two weeks, the ton of bricks pressing down on Lena’s chest lifts a little.

///

Day 16

Forgiveness happens in phases. Toes are dipped in water, then submerged as one abandons caution and dives into the sea of trust again.

Kara has started sending Lena daily apology texts again. Every single one is different. The CEO can’t help but be impressed at her best friend’s creativity and persistence. 

///

Day 16

“I’m going mad. I really am. She reads my texts but she doesn’t _reply_ . I have to do _something else_.” Kara is growling like a dog, and Alex would be laughing by now if she hadn’t spent the past 15 days trying to pull her sister out of abject misery. Every morning she shows up at Kara's apartment with 10 sticky buns and a cold compress for her swollen eyes. 

“Give her some time, Kara. She nodded after you went to her place to explain the other day. That’s a good sign. And at least she’s reading your messages. Take your victories. It’s just going to take time.” Alex rubs Kara’s shoulders soothingly.

“Hey, look at me.”

Kara looks up at the redhead helplessly, eyes brimming with tears again. She has spent more time crying than not for two weeks now. Alex makes a mental note to devise a sneaky way to test Kara for dehydration.

Kara’s phone vibrates. The blonde alien picks it up and reads the text at super-speed.

**Thank you for explaining. I just need some time.**

Kara smiles brightly. “She replied!”

Alex takes the opportunity to hold her glass of water to Kara’s lips. “That’s great! See, I told you.” Kara drinks distractedly, forgets to scold Alex for fussing.

///

Day 20

“Alex!”

“What’s wrong, Kar? Are you okay?”

“Lena texted me! She said, and I quote, ‘I don’t know if we can ever go back to normal again. But I’ve decided that I still want you in my life.”

Alex holds her phone away from her ear as Kara squeals for a whole minute. “Kara, that’s awesome, but I’m swamped at work. I’ll talk to you later, okay?” Alex hides a smile, and keeps her homemade Kryptonian dehydration test kit in a cabinet, where it will hopefully stay unused forever. She lets out a long, long sigh of relief, and for the first time in almost three weeks, her brows un-furrow. Time to focus on her poor, neglected girlfriend again. She texts Maggie.

A text comes in from Kara. **I’m going to ask Lena if she wants to come for movie night.**

Alex immediately begins typing furiously. **Kara! What did I say about giving the poor woman time!**

**But Alexxxxx it’s been THREE WEEKSSSS. I MISS HER!!!!!! Anyway I’ve already texted her so it’s too late kthxbye**

The older Danvers curses her sister’s impulsiveness and super-speed. 

///

Day 25

Things are a little awkward between them on movie night, but Kara hears Alex whisper “count your victories” as she walks past her in the kitchen. The Super takes comfort in the fact that Lena had placed her hand briefly over Kara’s knee when the shorter woman sat down on the couch - out of habit, probably, but it was _something_. How Kara had missed her best friend’s touch.

///

Day 30

If Kara’s being honest, she will admit that she brought forward Game Night just to see Lena again. She hopes against hope for more progress. Kara’s face falls when she opens the door and sees the hurt still flickering in Lena’s eyes, but arranges her face into a smile and hugs Lena. Lena closes her eyes and leans into Kara’s embrace, and the Kryptonian holds her up, wishes she never had to let go. But she does, because she doesn’t want to make Lena uncomfortable. 

When they win at charades, Kara freezes when Lena’s hand slips into hers, as though it’s the most natural thing in the world, intertwines their fingers, and squeezes. Lena releases her hand almost as quickly as she picked it up. But she smiles at Kara - a genuine, happy smile. Kara notices that Lena’s cheeks are a pretty shade of crimson.

 _Oh._ It is all the encouragement Kara needs. 

Kara puts the plan she had been brewing for a long time now into action. She decides to see Mon-El the next day.

///

Day 31

Mon-El looks guiltily at Kara and says, “Of course. Sorry, I shouldn’t have kept it for so long. It’s just - I was afraid you’d get me wrong if I suddenly returned-”

Kara smiles generously. “I understand. It’s okay. Thank you.” It feels good on her. Makes her feel brave. She’s glad - she hasn’t felt courageous for a month.

///

Day 37

It’s been a week since Game Night, and Kara is still going strong with her daily apologies. Today, it is the most adorable Japanese bento set with ingredients arranged in a sad face and Kara whispering “I’m sorry,” as she delivered it to Lena’s office.

“You don’t have to do this anymore, you know. I forgive you,” Lena says.

“You do???” Kara’s lip trembles.

“I forgave you two weeks ago, actually,” Lena quips, a naughty smirk on her face. “But I wanted to see when you’d run out of new ideas for ways to say you’re sorry.” 

Kara’s face is dead serious. “I already have the next month planned. I can still go ahead with it. Anyway, some of those plans are...non-refundable,” Kara laughs, relief flooding her system. She did not realise how much tension she had been holding in her body since the day Lena asked her to stay away.

Lena pulls Kara into a long, fierce hug. When they finally release each other, Kara grabs Lena’s hand firmly and says, “Let’s go to the rooftop.”

Lena arches an eyebrow, but allows herself to be dragged along. Anyway, it’s not like she can overpower the Girl of Steel.

The rooftop is very windy, and Kara immediately takes off her blazer and places it around Lena’s bare shoulders. Lena smiles, her eyes ridiculously moist. How did she survive all those days without Kara? She was such a sucker for this ray of sunshine and warm fuzzy happiness.

Kara takes off her glasses and bites the tip absentmindedly. “Lena…I...there’s one more thing I’ve not been...forthcoming with you about.”

Lena’s guard is up. Surely Kara had no more secrets? But she sees that Kara is consumed with nervousness. Lena holds Kara’s hands in her own.

“Breathe, Kara. That usually makes it easier to talk,” Lena smiles weakly despite the dread in her stomach. _I can’t go through this again._

“I-I…nevermind, I think it’s just easier if I…” Kara reaches into the pocket of her blazer that’s keeping Lena warm. “Sorry, let me just, erm-” Lena has never seen Kara this nervous. Except for the first time they met.

“I want you to have this,” Kara is biting her lip, and it is extremely adorable. 

When Lena stops being distracted by Kara’s mouth, she looks at Kara’s hand. Lena’s hand flies to her own mouth.

“Your mother’s necklace-”

“Yes.” Kara is looking at her with smouldering eyes. Lena doesn’t understand. Actually, she does, but...it can’t be...because Kara’s Kryptonian...and this means…

“Lena Kieran Luthor, will you be my girlfriend?” Kara asks bashfully, eyes radiating hope.

As a reply, Lena does what she has wanted to do since the first month of their friendship.

They don’t come up for air for an inhuman amount of time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you Leapyearbaby29 for giving me the necklace idea! :)


	8. It's Not My World If You're Not In It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Kara's Earth birthday - their first as a couple. Lena forgets AND shows up very late. Sanvers is there to big-sister the heartbroken Kara and glare at Lena. Lena feels like the worst girlfriend in the world, but thinks of an amazing gift to show Kara how sorry she is.
> 
> Bonus: Alex gives Lena the shovel talk.

Kara wonders what her girlfriend is planning. This morning, while Kara and Lena were getting dressed for work in the superhero’s apartment, Kara had asked Lena gleefully, “So what are we doing tonight?”

Lena replied without looking at her, engrossed in an email on her phone. “We’ll see. Work’s been really busy. Sorry babe.”

Kara’s face fell, but brightened up again as it occurred to her that Lena might be keeping whatever plans she had under wraps. It was the first time they were celebrating Kara’s Earth birthday as a couple, after all. “Okay!” She thought with glee about their first anniversary. Lena had kept it a surprise, pretended to be extremely busy at work when she had actually booked a romantic beach vacation for them. They spent a week at a cliffside villa on a private island Lena had bought for this very purpose, watching spectacular sunsets from the balcony and falling asleep in each other’s arms to the sound of waves crashing. She had even packed for the both of them. Kara knew that last-minute packing is no joke without super-speed. 

Back in the present, Kara catches herself daydreaming about what her romantic and over-the-top girlfriend has in store for them, for the fifth time that day. And it’s only lunchtime. Her phone gives two short buzzes - her special signal for texts from Lena. She checks her phone excitedly.

**Sorry darling, gotta cancel on you for lunch. Crazy day at work. See you at home, I love you.**

Kara’s heart sinks. She types an understanding reply and thinks maybe Lena needs more time to clear her work so that she could focus on spending quality time with Kara tonight. She resolves to focus on her article for the rest of the day. At 6pm, she types the last word with a flourish and knocks off half an hour earlier than usual. Then she remembers that Lena may still be making some last-minute preparations, and decides to walk home instead of flying. 

The excitement in Kara's body is building, and she bounces on her toes in the lift as it crawls up to her floor. She can't resist using her powers to look into her flat, and sees a huge HAPPY EARTH BIRTHDAY KARA banner hanging in her living room. She puts on her best "oh you shouldn't have" expression and bursts through the door. "Baby, I'm home!" She trills.

Alex walks out of Kara's bedroom, makes a face and says, "Lena's not home yet, you lovesick puppy." 

"Oh." Kara pouts.

"Aww, I'm sure she's on the way. Come here." Alex folds her into a hug. "Happy Earth birthday, Kara." Kara pushes up her glasses, beams again. "Thank you."

"Maggie's coming after work. I've got mounds of potstickers and pizza on the way, and your favourite musicals queued up on Netflix."

"Yay!" Kara gives Alex her "best sister ever" smile. 

* * *

As Kara is taking a shower, Alex looks worriedly at her phone. Lena hasn't replied her all day about what time she'll reach Kara's house. The older Danvers sister hopes the workaholic hasn't forgotten. Kara would be heartbroken. 

* * *

Lena comes home at 9pm, brandishing doughnuts. She says, "I'm so sorry Kara, I-" Her mouth forms a crimson O of shock when she sees the birthday banner. On the couch, Kara is sandwiched between Maggie and Alex. Lena's heart twinges when she sees that Kara is hugging Alex tightly in the way she only does when very upset. 

Alex and Maggie carefully orchestrate their movements such that the detective replaces Alex without waking Kara up. The sleeping beauty stirs, emits a little snuffle but doesn’t open her eyes. The DEO Director gets up and stands in front of Lena, arms folded. 

"She's sleeping. Let's talk outside." The redhead's face is dark with anger.

Lena swallows hard and nods, steps out into the corridor with Alex.

"You forgot."

Lena hangs her head, feels like she is four again at the Luthor mansion, stupid, unworthy. "I thought it was just a normal date night. I'm so sorry. There was so much work and I-" Alex holds up a palm, cutting her off.

"That's not going to cut it for me. Lena, she cried herself to sleep. You know how sad she gets on her Earth birthday. On top of that, she thought you were planning a surprise. Turns out you were  _ caught up with work _ ?! She was still defending you, too, but clearly she was heartbroken. And I know this _ isn’t _ the first time." Alex's eyes flash with anger and disappointment. 

Lena closes her eyes and pinches the bridge of her nose, guilt and exhaustion engulfing her. The older Danvers sees the shutters start to come down in Lena, sees the CEO withdrawing into herself. Alex’s eyes soften and she grabs Lena’s arm. “Lena. Look at me.”

Lena opens reddened eyes but casts them on the floor, can’t bring herself to look at Alex. “I’m the worst girlfriend in the world, aren’t I.” A self-deprecating smile - Lena’s specialty.

Alex grabs Lena’s shoulders. Lena finally meets Alex’s gaze, and finds it warm, full of concern. 

“Lena. Hey. Right now, you might be. But you make Kara happy  _ every single day _ . This was just a mistake. If you did this on purpose, I’d have no trouble telling you you are not good enough and personally kicking you out of the apartment. Sorry if I was a bit harsh. I just hate seeing Kara upset. I  _ have _ to protect her. Just...fix this and don’t do it again, okay? I know your work is very important to you but you gotta prioritise Kara.”

Lena nods with renewed determination. “Always. From now on.” 

“Now. I’m going to distract her if she wakes up. You have one hour. Fix this. Go get her something.”

Lena has no idea what she’s going to do. She goes back down the elevator, paces at Kara’s lobby as she thinks. After a minute, she has it. It’s not complete, but it’ll have to do.

The Luthor comes back less than an hour later, breathless, clutching her latest invention in both of her arms. The superhero is up, socked feet on top of the table. Lena hears some sniffling, and her heart squeezes with dread and pain for her girlfriend. She swears to herself never to leave the office late again when she has plans with Kara, big or small. Well, to try her darndest anyway. A lifetime of habits takes time to break. But she’s determined.

Maggie tells Alex, “That’s our cue.” Kara gets up to hug her sister and the detective, her eyes avoiding Lena the whole time.

Lena closes the door behind the couple, whispering another apology and a “thank you”. She puts her invention on the dining table and walks over to Kara. She can see the dried tear tracks on her face. “Kara, I’m so sorry. Please look at me.” 

Wet blue eyes look up.

“I will never miss your Earth birthday again, okay? Never. Or any other plan we have unless L-Corp is on fire.”

Kara gives a watery smile. “I’ll put it out and then you can come. So you really have no excuse.” Supergirl’s voice is so soft and vulnerable and Lena almost begins hating herself once again. Instead, the Luthor casts her dark thoughts aside and embraces Kara tightly. After a heartbeat, Kara hugs her back.

“I have something for you. It doesn’t make up for what I did, but I hope you will at least consider it a good Earth birthday gift.”

Kara is curious now, and Lena even sees a hint of excitement in those eyes.

“Close your eyes, sweetheart,” Lena instructs, and leads Kara by the hand to her bedroom. She switches on her invention.

Kara opens her eyes, and sees her bedroom in Krypton. “Lena! How are you doing this?” Lena is next to her, holding her hand. Kara can feel the warmth and softness of Lena’s hand. It tells her she’s not dreaming.

The Kryptonian’s eyes fill with tears. “I’ve missed this place  _ so much _ , you have no idea.”

Lena studies the awe on Kara’s face, and beams for the first time that day. “This is a Krypton simulator. Well, a prototype anyway. I fed it with data from your mother, AI Alura and Kelex. Eventually the idea is for it to be able to simulate the entire planet just before it was...you know, so you can visit it whenever you miss your original home.” 

Kara gazes at Lena, wonderstruck, tears flowing again. She kisses her genius girlfriend. “ _ Thank you _ . You don’t know how much this means to me.”

“I started working on it the last time you dreamt about Krypton and woke up sobbing.” Lena’s heart aches for Kara again at the memory. “When the simulator is fully operational, will you show me around your whole planet?”

Kara nods vigorously, too choked up with emotion to speak. Lena hugs her tightly again, kisses her on the temple. “I’m so sorry, again.”

“It’s okay, I forgive you,” Kara says in a kind, gentle way that Lena knows really means,  _ Nobody’s perfect. I’ll always forgive you. _

“Happy Earth birthday, baby.” Lena kisses Kara tenderly.

For the hour that remains of Kara’s special day, she shows Lena around her room, excitedly opening her favourite books and teaching Lena a few Kryptonese words and phrases. When they lie down on the bed and look up at the transparent ceiling, admiring the millions of multi-coloured stars, they embrace, and Kara drifts off to sleep, dreaming of another universe where Krypton didn’t die, but Lena and Alex are still hers. Kara smiles in her sleep, hoping that in this moment, in every universe, she is in Lena’s arms, and Alex is in Maggie’s.


	9. It's Not As Sexy As When You Wear It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So everybody’s reacting to the new pants-only supersuit, so I decided to as well. XD Thanks for your patience with the long pause between updates! And THANK YOU for all the comments - they really really keep me going. <3

Kara’s first thought when Winn unveils the new pants-only supersuit is not about how she doesn’t have to be embarrassed anymore about flying around in a cheerleader’s skirt. Or how much she misses the red. All those thoughts come later, but it is not the first.

Her first thought is a mental picture of Lena wearing it. And my, would she rock it. It’s a random thought, because Lena has never suggested it, although judging by the way her eyes turn dark green and how she bites her lip every time she sees Kara dressed as Supergirl, she knows that yeah, her girlfriend is a big fan of the suit.

Kara loves Lena in every suit, and now the desire to see her in a supersuit is as powerful as her daily need to devour 50 potstickers. 

She already has an idea of how to fulfill this wish. But first, she needs to ascertain that Lena likes this new suit. 

“Thanks Winn! I love it.” Kara smiles at her best male friend, changes at warp speed and heads straight for L-Corp.

“Somebody’s in a hurry,” he smirks at Alex as Kara blasts off.

“10 bucks says she’s on the way to show Lena,” quips the redheaded Danvers.

“20 bucks says Lena makes her take it off.”

“Eew! That’s my sister you’re talking about!”

Supergirl hovers on top of the L-Corp balcony, setting off the sensors that make the floor-to-ceiling glass windows in Lena’s office project the scenery outside, in case someone is having a meeting with Lena. She lands softly and touches the hidden button that alerts Jess and Lena that the superhero is here and not to let anyone into Lena’s office. 

Lena turns around from her seat at the desk, her frown of concentration replaced with a smile of pure happiness. Kara loves that grin, loves that even after two years of dating, Lena is still as delighted to see her as Kara is. The Luthor’s mouth drops open as she notices the new suit, takes it in.

Kara spins around shyly, giving Lena a 360-degree view. “It’s fresh out of the oven. You’re the first person outside of the DEO to see it. What do you think?”

Lena steps closer to Kara, approving eyes sweeping over her girlfriend. “Does it have the extra safety features that I talked to Winn about?”

“Yup. I have maximum-level Kryptonite protection now, thanks to the both of you. He even added hidden speed-dial buttons for you, Alex and the DEO, to transmit a live feed during those big nasty fights,” Kara beams. 

"So this new suit is sexy as hell, keeps you safe, and can give me live updates when you’re in danger. Winn has outdone himself this time.” Lena reaches for Kara’s shoulders and playfully squeezes her biceps. “Are these padded, or have you been punching cars again?” 

“I-uh, I was bored when you were on your business trip,” Kara blushes, and Lena’s eyes darken with desire. The CEO breaks eye contact for the first time since Kara showed up, picks up the phone. “Jess, postpone my next meeting. I have some urgent business to attend to.”

“Am I your urgent business?” Kara asks bashfully.

“Always, darling.” A naughty smirk. 

“Is the zip still in the same place?” 

“Yes,” Kara breathes as Lena plants hot kisses on her neck. The billionaire places her palm on Supergirl’s chest and pushes her down onto the desk. Lena’s phone rings. “Ignore it,” Kara pants, “the suit calls you when I tap the crest. I asked Winn to put the button there.”

“Good to know your heart literally calls out to me now,” Lena quips, her smile tender. She proceeds to show Kara just how much she appreciates how her girlfriend looks in the new suit.

///

When the urgent business is concluded, Kara flies back to the DEO, grinning dopily. 

“Did Lena postpone her next meeting when you showed her?” Winn asks with an ill-disguised grin.

“Y-essss..why do you ask?”

“Nothing. Alex, you owe me.”

Kara wonders briefly why Alex looks disgusted as she hands over her money, before asking, “Winn, can you make another suit but according to these specifications?”

Winn stares at the memo Kara has scribbled. “This isn’t your size. Do Kryptonians undergo a second puberty?” He teases. 

Alex rolls her eyes. “Oh my god, I’m getting out of here.” She walks off to the training room.

“This is gonna cost you,” Winn says, wiggling his eyebrows. “The materials for the new suit’s a bitch to get hold of.”

“Okay, what’s it gonna be? More exclusive Star Wars merchandise?”

“I want a life-sized stormtrooper just like Lena’s.”

“You know I don’t make that much at CatCo right?”

“Yes, but the owner of CatCo does.”

“She is  _ not _ my sugar daddy! I’ll just skip pot-stickers and sticky buns for a month,” Kara pouts.

“Wow! That’s...that’s true love.” 

///

Two weeks later, Kara clutches Lena’s supersuit in her hands. She looks around furtively. No one is around. She does a little jig of glee. She’s not sure if she’s capable of thinking clearly after so long without potstickers and sticky buns (Lena is getting suspicious), but now she is having doubts about whether Lena would actually like it. What if she thinks it’s weird and egomaniacal? Well, it’s too late now. She already bought Winn the life-sized stormtrooper, and knows what poor feels like for the first time. Rao, she would kill for some pot-stickers and sticky-buns right now. To make her feel better about being poor. The irony.

As she looks at the suit, admiring the feel of the textured material underneath her fingers, touching the House of El crest, warmth gushes into her chest and she realises why she wanted so much to give Lena this suit. Well, other than the sexiness factor. She breaks the sound barrier on her flight to L-Corp.

Kara watches Lena for a second when she lands, the adorable furrow in the brunette’s brow starting a small fire in her chest. She knocks on the glass door of the balcony.

Lena smiles as she gets up, hurries to the balcony and gives Kara a tight hug even though they had just seen each other that morning. “I missed you,” her sweet girlfriend breathes. Kara’s heart flips.

She grins back, knowing she looks like a lovesick teenager. “Me too. I have something for you.”

Lena does her signature eyebrow raise when she sees the suit. “For me? I don’t understand, this is your suit.”

“If you try it on, you’ll find that it’s not my size.” Kara grins.

Lena looks at the suit again, seriously this time. The left corner of her mouth lifts, and her eyes take on a mischievous glint. “I see. Someone has a fantasy.”

“No! I mean, it’s not just that. I had Winn do some modifications...other than the size I mean. You get attacked way too often for my liking. The suit is bulletproof and protected against most alien weaponry, so I thought you could wear it underneath your clothes whenever you want to. There’s a button underneath the cape that makes the suit invisible but retains its protective properties. If you press the crest, it’ll send out a distress signal that only I can hear. Just like that bracelet I gave you. The suit will also automatically alert me if it absorbs any damage, and-”

Lena kisses Kara square on the lips, ending her overprotective superhero's rambling. “Thank you."

“You're welcome. there is one last thing I wanted to tell you. Before you interrupted me,” Kara rolls her eyes affectionately.

“At first, I really did just want to see you in my suit. But when it was done and I was picturing you in it…” Kara swallows and blushes. “I realised that it’s because I want you to wear the House of El crest.”

Lena puts her hand over her mouth, her eyes reddening and growing moist. “But in your culture, people only wear another family’s crest when…”

“When they’re married.” Kara confirms, her cheeks turning even redder. “Which I’d like to. When you feel ready. Someday! I mean, I just wanted you to know that that’s where I see our relationship going...in case you were wondering...that is to say, I do want to marry you someday. Soon!” She gesticulates wildly, hating how flustered she sounds. Rao, if she’s  _ this  _ nervous now, how is she ever going to propose?

“I will await your proposal, then.” Lena pulls her into a deep kiss, one which tells Kara what her answer will be when the day comes. 

The day does come, dear reader, and sooner than either of them expect, but that is another story for another day.

For now, I invite you to indulge me, and imagine that the two lovebirds manage to wait until the end of the day, when they are at Lena’s apartment, for our favourite Luthor to try on the suit.

Imagine Kara, beautiful Kara, bathed in warm lighting, golden hair framing her face as she lounges on an enormous bed between ridiculously-soft sheets. Watch her smile with pride when Lena shares her idea about sponsoring cancer treatments while changing into the suit. Your favourite slow song plays in the background. Picture Kara’s gasp as Lena walks out of the bathroom casually, how the Kryptonian mentally thanks Rao that she has bagged the hottest woman in the universe.

Imagine Kara’s revering touch as she gently, slowly, teases the zip down, smiling beatifically when she feels Lena shudder with desire.

Viridian eyes redden as Kara whispers in her ear, “I may be Supergirl, but you’re the real hero in my eyes, you know that right?” Because Lillian Luthor was wrong, wrong, wrong, and finally, finally, there is someone who is proud of her, just for being herself and doing what she thinks is right. Just for being Lena Luthor. The thought makes her feel...superhuman.


	10. It’s Not Goodbye If I Don’t Actually Leave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena finds that she hates saying goodbye to Kara, and tries all means and ways to lengthen their time together. The evolution of their relationship through their extended goodbyes.

They say that if you don’t nip bad habits in the bud, they grow into vices. Lena knows this is true, because her vice is lingering in Kara’s company.

She started doing it from the first time they met. She walked Kara to the door of her office, waited for Clark to leave first and then clasped Kara’s hand, even though the Luthor usually avoids physical contact. Thankfully, Cat’s sweet blonde assistant doesn’t know that. She allowed her hand to linger for a second longer than necessary, saying, “I really do hope we meet again, Miss Danvers.” Kara had smiled back, and even though Lena had just met this person, she felt the darkest corners of her jaded heart begin to soften at the edges, and start to let some light in. Looking at that dazzler of a grin, right then and there, Lena knew she was a goner. How do you say no to sunshine personified?

Like any bad habit, it intensified over time. Slowly, but surely, her addiction to being around Kara made her extended goodbyes grow from seconds into hours. Frankly, it is starting to get ridiculous, and Lena knows it, but she can’t stop herself. She only wonders why Kara lets her get away with it. Her blonde best friend is clearly a busy girl, but still she lets Lena take up much more of her time than her fair share. Sure, Kara always says it’s because she loves Lena’s company, but Kara loves everyone.

Lena starts getting creative to mask her embarrassing habit.

At their weekly lunches, she buys Kara’s favourite dessert du jour, hides it, and then pulls it out from behind her back just as they’ve finished their main courses. Kara feigns surprise every single time, and Lena gets to admire that adorable telltale crinkle on her nose. Sure, she’s getting fat, but it’s all worth it when Kara’s entire face lights up and she decides that her jerk-face boss can wait, and Lena gets to enjoy another five minutes of bliss as Kara devours the whole thing. She starts to buy bigger, messier desserts, just to stall, and she observes that Kara starts to slow down her eating, probably out of self-consciousness about chewing with her mouth open. Not that Lena minds. It’s adorkable.

Lena knows that she has reached a new low when CatCo goes on the market, and she buys it just because she wants to put a smile on post-apocalyptic (otherwise known as post-Mon-El) Kara’s face. And because the thought of being five steps away from Kara’s desk makes her feel all tingly for no reason. Nevermind that it’s not strictly a good business move - after all, magazines are a sunset industry, but hey, she’s always enjoyed a challenge. Sometimes to her detriment, especially when it comes to straight-as-an-arrow Kara Danvers.

Lena punches her fist in the air when Kara invites her to Game Night for the first time, then looks around self-consciously. She makes a mental note to look into replacing those floor-to-ceiling glass windows in her office. 

Lena starts small, by bringing merlot to Game Night and suggesting that Kara have a drink with her when everyone has left, insisting that they need to celebrate Kara’s first byline, or first day without getting a scolding from Snapper, or first punctuation-error-free article. Sometimes she even shares her achievements at L-Corp, although it makes her blush every single time when Kara reacts with over-the-top cheers and a dorky victory dance. And a lingering, sometimes bone-crushing but always life-affirming hug. Oh, her hugs were the best. To her increasing surprise, Kara plays along every time Lena makes up some excuse not to say goodbye for another couple of hours. 

Because life gets in the way, Lena does not get to stall every time, and actually does leave with the rest of the Super Friends on some nights. By Lena’s fourth Game Night, the Super Friends are already teasing Kara about how she always takes forever to say goodbye to Lena, while the rest of them only get perfunctory waves. 

The first time she stays over after Game Night, it isn’t on purpose. Kara puts on a movie after the last game, and Lena falls asleep because she had pulled an all-nighter to make a Kryptonite shield for Supergirl, whom she knows is really Kara. Totally worth it, but she doesn’t realise exactly how tired she is until halfway through the movie, because being around Kara always fills her with energy. One moment she’s watching Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams making out, and the next, she is looking through hooded eyelids at Kara tucking her in ever so gently, with that wonderful smile on her face. She hears Kara shooing everyone else home in hushed tones. “She needs to sleep. Poor girl, she’s so exhausted. I wish she wouldn’t work so hard. Alex, what’s a good multivitamin for workaholics? I’ll go buy it right now.” She knows she should get up and leave, that she shouldn’t impose, but she tells herself,  _ just let me have tonight _ . For the first time, she allows herself to fantasise that maybe, just maybe, Kara is not just being nice/polite and really does want her around. That night, she has the best night of sleep in her life. It is followed by the best morning of her life so far when she wakes up in Kara’s bed, somehow having been transferred from the couch sometime during the night. By some other miracle, Kara has shifted in her sleep and has her head buried in Lena’s chest. She looks like she’s having a sweet dream. Lena’s heart skips a beat at the precious sight of sleeping, smiling Kara. A bottle of multivitamins sits on Kara’s bedside table. The sight of it starts a small fire in Lena’s chest and makes her eyes well up. What did she do to deserve such a wonderful best friend? She thanks everything that has happened in her life that has led her to meeting Kara in National City. She tries to get out of bed with minimal movement, but the moment her chest separates from Kara’s head, the Super frowns and puts her arms around Lena’s waist, pulling her closer. Somehow, it feels like the most natural thing in the world. Yup, best morning ever.

The best morning evolves into the best day when Kara wakes up, does not seem to notice that she’s hugging Lena, and announces that she’s working from home today. Lena decides that there is no better day than today to take the morning off - after all, she hasn’t had a day off in three years. 

She quickly realises that maybe she shouldn’t have waited so long to give herself a break. Lena’s plan to leave after breakfast is foiled when she starts sneezing violently into the heavenly pancakes Kara’s made. Lena pouts. She really wants to finish them because Kara made them for  _ her _ . She knows she’s imposed on Kara enough, and insists on leaving, but Kara is having none of it, especially after she puts a thermometer into Lena’s mouth.

The next thing she knows, Kara is tucking her into bed, and being the best nurse anyone has ever had. The most perfect best friend in the world. When she wakes up again, Kara’s worried face is hovering over her, and feeling her forehead. Lena has never had someone she loves touch her this tenderly when she’s sick, and the tears, when they come, are inevitable.

Kara takes her into her arms. “Poor thing. I know it feels terrible, but you’ll be okay. I’ll be right here until you’re all better.” Lena doesn’t trust herself to speak, because all she can think about right now is how much she loves Kara. She sniffs loudly because she can’t breathe, and cringes with embarrassment. Kara misunderstands, thinks Lena is getting even more upset. 

To comfort her, Kara presses her lips to Lena’s forehead, and time seems to stop as she stares deeply into Lena's eyes. Entranced by those baby blues, Lena’s hands reach out of their own volition and land on either side of Kara’s face. Lena moves her lips, closer. Closer. She doesn’t know what she’s doing but she also doesn’t care. Kara closes her eyes, but Lena stops. Does Kara want this? Is she misinterpreting all the signals?

Kara misreads Lena’s hesitation as fear of spreading her germs. “I can’t get sick, because I...I’m…” Kara removes her glasses and her hair tie.

Lena throws all caution to the winds - she’s done thinking and holding herself back. Let this girl break her heart for all she cares - she just wants this moment. “I know,” Lena says gently, and kisses Kara full on the lips. Kara moans, and increases the pressure on Lena's lips. When they come up for air, Lena's head is spinning, but she knows it has nothing to do with the fever.

After that day, Lena and Kara stop hiding how bad they are at saying goodbye to each other. They begin the slow dance that is their relationship, moving in lockstep towards the day when they never have to part again. Months later, Lena buys them their first apartment together. Two years to the date of that fateful Game Night when Lena accidentally stayed over, Lena goes on bended knee, and Kara says yes before she’s even finished the question. 

All the while, Lena and Kara’s addiction to each other grows with each minute they spend together. 

For this vice, there is no known cure.


	11. It's Not Right to Ask Her Until my Heart is Whole

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena and Kara retrieve the missing pieces of their hearts from the people they gave it to, and face those who broke it in other ways.
> 
> Pretext: Lena knows Kara is Supergirl right from the start.

After the tenth time they defied death together, Kara and Lena each quietly decided to stop denying to herself how she felt about her best friend. A butterfly flew into each of their mouths, and their friendship was never the same again. **It was less.** For the first time since their friendship began, they had a secret from each other. **It was more.** Both were no longer interested in just being friends. Whenever they saw each other, the butterflies danced in their guts, mirroring each other. Each butterfly wreaked havoc on their host's body, pulling a variety of strings each time Kara and Lena met to trigger specific reactions.

Furious blushes once heads are turned.

Gazes that convey a world of words they cannot say. Extended goodbyes that rouse complaints from the Super Friends. 

When they were apart, the butterflies didn't rest, either. Gleefully, they commanded each brain to play endless loops of memories until they reunited, and made more. The butterflies kept score on who initiated contact first. 

Around the time when their hugs were stretching to three minutes long, the tiny flutterers in Kara and Lena’s stomachs initiated phase 2. Each planted an identical epiphany in its woman’s brain: _I can’t give my heart when it isn’t whole. She deserves all of it._

The two masterminds guided the Super and the Luthor deftly towards this new goal.

The first piece of Kara’s heart was with her college sweetheart. Kara flew to Midvale and listened for her heartbeat, a sound she thought she had long forgotten. It came back to her once she thought about it, like legs pedalling a bike. Then she ran into her accidentally-on-purpose, at a coffeeshop.

“Kara Danvers! Hi!” Alyssa’s big brown eyes widened, and a flush peeked out from beneath bronzed cheeks. 

Alyssa remembered her, and judging by the blush and heightened heartbeat, she recalled how their relationship had ended, too.

“How are you?” Alyssa eyes softened with genuine concern. That’s one of the things Kara had loved about her. How she was always so interested in hearing what other people had to say

“I’m good.” Kara smiled.

They talked for a little while, of inconsequential things - what Kara was doing in Midvale (visiting - not strictly a lie) and Alyssa’s job as a dental hygienist. What their college schoolmates were up to these days.

“Listen, Kara. There are some things I never got to say. You moved to National City so quickly after we...broke up...but that’s just an excuse I kept telling myself. It wasn’t right, leaving things like I did.” Alyssa’s eyes study the floor. After a pause, she looks up again, with reddened eyes. “I’m so, so sorry I cheated on you.”

Kara willed herself not to cry. 19-year-old her had prayed every day for this apology, for this closure, and now, so many years later, she was finally getting it, long after she had stopped wishing.

“I forgive you,” Kara said with a smile. Her butterfly darted out of Kara’s mouth, retrieved the piece of her heart from where it had been attached to Alyssa’s for so many years, and replaced it.

///

Lena’s first love was in Metropolis. Raina Waters never suspected that Lena was in love with her, throughout high school. They were best friends, and Lena was by her side through all the jocks she dated, every last one of whom, in Lena’s opinion, did not deserve one iota of Raina. Of course, she never believed that she deserved Raina either, and had never confessed, fearing it would end their friendship. Lena smiled sadly to herself at this memory. Now she was in a familiar situation, (hopefully) with a different ending. 

Lena knew what she had to do to let Raina go, embrace the teenage her who was so ashamed of who she loved, to shed the last of that shame, expunge the darkness that she still carried with her because of those painful years.

First things first. She unfollowed Raina on all her social media accounts (even LinkedIn), so that she would never again marvel at how well Raina had aged, would not feel that tiny twinge in her heart whenever she saw an update. She would stop liking her pictures in faint hope that Raina would one day respond, and show that she still remembered Lena after all these years. Lena felt good, freeing herself from that sting of shame whenever she tapped that Like button. After she unfollowed Raina on Instagram, she saw a new upload from Kara. It was a picture of Kara and Lena after a few beers at the alien bar - their faces were flushed with matching grins, heads leaning in towards each other. _#throwback to an awesome night with my bestie._ Lena liked the picture immediately, and felt proud instead of pathetic.

Next, she rummaged in her closet, took out the precious stack of letters she and Raina had exchanged for a few short weeks before her ex-best friend had seemingly moved on, adjusted to the new city she was in, and forgot all about Lena. She walked to the trash can and threw the bundle away. Then she emptied out all the trash in the house. It felt good. She felt free. Lighter. It took time - weeks - but she felt the shame and darkness leave her, bit by bit. Every time it happened, she knew that she was a big step closer to falling into the light.

///

Kara had been dreading this for days, but she thought of Lena’s face, and her burning desire to take in all of her exquisite beauty for as long as she wanted. She would, one day. Hopefully soon. She thought of Lena’s soft smile, the special one that always made Alex snigger and nudge Kara, and felt a surge of courage.

She put on her Supersuit, just to feel braver, and marched into the DEO, straight up to Mon-El. “We need to talk.” Mon-El followed her into an empty training room. The whole time, his head was down, and he avoided her gaze. This was exactly why Kara wanted to talk to him.

Kara began the speech she prepared. “Mon-El, look at me.” With effort, Mon-El met her gaze. “I want you to be able to look straight into my eyes from now on whenever we talk. Mon-El, what happened between us...it was wonderful, but I have accepted its end. Yes, I loved you with all my heart and yes, I was devastated for a long time after you left. And I was heartbroken again when you came back a married man. I was furious and sad, all at the same time. I appreciated your distance then, even though I could never bring myself to tell you. But you no longer need to avoid me. I’m fully healed, Mon-El, have been for a while, and I sincerely wish you and your wife well. And I’m happy for you two. I just want you to continue living your life fully, without any more guilt.”

Mon-El’s eyes were full of relief, and a tinge of regret. She was happy to find that when once she could see her whole universe in those eyes, she now felt only peace. “Thank you, Kara. For telling me. I’ve been wanting to return to you your mother’s necklace, and I think now is the best time.”

He handed over the necklace, and Kara thanked him. She held out her arms with an easy smile, and Mon-El entered her embrace, laughing. Their hug was friendly and nostalgic, all at once.

The butterfly slotted in the once-missing piece of Kara’s heart, and stepped back to look at its handiwork. The heart was now whole, but shrouded in a light mist of fear. 

It decided that Kara had one more stop to make. It would happen at Argo the next week, at F'nsilo - the Kryptonian festival of forgiveness.

///

Lena took off her aviator sunglasses when she reached Jack's grave. She had introduced him to Kara as her Kryptonite. It was true. He had been, and now she was here to try to change that. She laid down fresh flowers. She felt dampness on her face, and for a moment, it felt like she just lost him yesterday, not exactly a year ago. Just chose the lives of Kara and the rest of the world over his. The guilt returned to her heart all at once, and the pain was so excruciating that for a second she wondered how she survived his loss. Then, she remembered. Kara. Kara, sitting next to her, embracing her so tightly she almost couldn't breathe, but in a good way, telling her she would always be there for her, and that she would give Lena anything she needed. Anything, and Lena just had to tell her. Kara, chivalrous, selfless Kara, who had slept on Lena's couch for almost a week before Lena had recovered enough to put on a brave front, asked the exhausted superhero to go home, reassured the Kryptonian that she would be okay, that she couldn't sleep on her couch forever. Kara had been torn, penetrating Lena's soul with her eyes, blue eyes brimming with worry, concern. Love. But she had heard Lena's real request - to grieve alone for a while, and respected it. Lena had looked into those fiercely loyal eyes and known that she would get through this with her best friend by her side.

She was always silent when she visited Jack, not believing that dead men could speak. But not today.

"I'm so sorry, Jack. I know I saved so many lives by ending yours, but I know it wasn't my decision to make, and I'm so sorry that I felt I had no choice. I should have thought harder for a better solution.

Are you jealous that I fell for Kara after you left? I didn't want to, either. I wanted to mourn you forever. But my heart...it had different ideas." Lena let herself feel the full force of her remaining grief, and broke down in front of the grave of the man she had once loved with all her heart, and still missed, would always miss. 

When she was all out of tears, she bent down, kissed two of her fingers, then touched them to the granite.

"Most of all, Jack, I'm sorry that I have to let you go. I know you would have wanted me to find someone else, and I have. I hope you haven't changed your mind, cos it's too late now." She chuckled a little, feeling silly talking to a dead man. She had to admit that it helped a lot, though. "I've fallen so hard, Jack. I want to give her all of me, and so I have to move on, to let go of this guilt, to take my heart back from you. But I'll never, never forget you."

A strong gust of wind blew, and Lena wrapped her coat tighter around herself. She was about to get up when she saw something glinting in the grass. She picked it up. It was a gold-plated keychain featuring the chemical composition of the male Danaidae butterfly’s pheromone - the gift she had given to Jack to confess her feelings. She had no idea what it was doing here, but she had goosebumps now and for the first time in her life, she entertained the notion that supernatural forces exist. "Thank you, Jack," she whispered. 

* * *

Kara's ears had been tuned to the sound of Lena crying for so long now that she was almost as quick at detecting it as she was at identifying Alex's. She heard it shortly after Lena arrived at the grave, heard the start of the conversation with Jack, then tuned out to give her privacy. She decided to wait for Lena at her car. 

When Lena walked back to the car, tears still drying on her face, nose slightly red, but still devastatingly beautiful, her face lit up when she saw Kara. They spoke without words, Kara inclining her head in concern, Lena giving a small smile and a nod. _I'm okay, now that you're here._ Kara wiped away Lena's tears, and her touch was so tender that Lena almost gave in to the temptation to lean in and press her lips to Kara's. But she didn't. Instead, she allowed herself to take Kara's hand and thread her fingers through hers. Although it was the first time, it felt like they had been doing it forever. Kara squeezed her hand, and it felt like the most natural thing in the world. Lena felt courage fill her heart. She tried to hold on to this feeling - she would need every ounce of bravery to do one last thing before she was ready to give Kara the entire world. 

Throughout the car ride, their hands stay clasped.

///

The last time Kara celebrated the festival of forgiveness was the last year Krypton still existed. Her final year before her world was literally torn apart, and her life was thrown far off the axis of normalcy. Kal-El had no memories of this festival. "Today, we honour Rao by seeking forgiveness from our loved ones whom we have hurt," Alura explained. "I would like to start first."

Alura turned to her daughter, eyes soft, face grave. She ran her fingers through Kara's hair - an action which always soothed Kara, especially when she was sad or sick as a child. "My beloved Kara. I am so sorry for all the things your father and I did to cause Krypton's doom, and for sending you to Earth all alone. I want you to know that I thought of you and missed you every single day, and I absolutely regretted leaving you. I know you've been fighting feelings of abandonment since, and I can only continue to try to make it up to you." Alura looked down, arms at her sides, a single tear making its escape down her face. Kara stepped forward, took both of her mother's hands in her own, and said, "I know you were only doing what you thought was best, Mum." Both women embrace, and dry their tears.

Kal-El stepped forward, took Kara's hand in his own. "Kara, I owe you an apology too. The first thing I did after you had just spent years in the Phantom Zone alone was to Ieave you to the Danvers. I know I didn't visit you often enough, because every time I did, I saw the loneliness in your eyes. I felt so guilty for not even trying to take care of you on my own. And for not sticking around to first ease you into life on Earth, help you begin to process the trauma you'd gone through. I'm so sorry, Kara. I should have handled it better." The Man of Steel looked like an anguished little boy, the shame of his mistakes washing over him anew as he sought forgiveness.

Kara's face was wet again as she hugged Kal fiercely, taking pleasure in being able to use as much pressure as she would like because he was just like her: not human. "You put me with the most nurturing family I could ever have, and gave me the best sister and parents I could ever have wished for. You were dealing with a lot of things in your life at the time and truly felt that I would be better off with the Danvers. I never did blame you, Kal. But thank you."

As the three Kryptonians embraced, the butterfly in Kara's heart flapped its wings, and the mist of fear surrounding it dissipated. For the first time in a long, long time, Kara felt a more permanent sense of peace and security settle in her chest.

After the festival, Kara had just reached home when her phone rang. She grinned. "Lena! I was just thinking of calling you."

"People do say I'm psychic. How was the festival?" She sighed with contentment, snuggled up with her favourite blanket on the couch and told Lena all about her day. Her smile grew wider as a beautiful thought occured to her. _Soon, I’ll be able to do this every day. With her in my arms, never letting go._

///

After months of preparation from the two women, the butterflies know that tonight is the night when both would finally be ready.

Lena waits in her office, hands wringing. She had set the appointment at 10pm and sent Jess home, just in case there is a violent reaction. She is confident in her plan, so the nervousness she feels is irrational. All her life, up till recently, she has done exactly the opposite of what she is about to do. Pushed down her own feelings and carried out her duties. Rationalised using all of her intellect, until she could stomach what is asked of her. Denying her true self for more than two decades.

After tonight, no longer. 

The fact that Kara is hovering above L-Corp, watching everything, makes her feel comforted and anxious all at once. Asking Kara to come had been the most difficult part of this plan. Her heart was so unwilling to put Kara at risk, but it also told her that Kara would be so mad if she found out that Lena did this alone, took such a great risk. The last time Lena did something even close to this, Kara had not spoken to her for days. When they made up, Kara had made Lena promise to let other people help her, to let Kara in. And she would come, anyway, if things went awry. Might as well maximise her chances of surviving this. After all, she really, really didn’t want to die before she got the chance to kiss Kara. What she did not tell Kara, though, is that she is carrying a pocket bomb that would explode on impact, faster than Supergirl can swoop in and risk her life to save Lena if things go way, way south.

This is the worst case scenario. Logically, it should not even come to this. All other safety measures are in place. 

She had spent months perfecting her full-body Kryptonite armour for Kara, which she had insisted that Kara wear tonight. The building is clear of everyone except herself, and Kara is making sure no one else approaches.

The clock strikes 10pm, and Lillian walks in. Lena takes a deep breath, decides that she is as ready as she’ll ever be. She really hopes she does not have to commit matricide.

“Lena.” Lillian nods.

“Mother. Let’s skip the pleasantries and get right down to business.”

Lena gestures towards the 60-inch screen in her office, which starts showing photos of Lillian and Cadmus, and schematics of alien weaponry used in recent attacks.

“I have been collecting evidence of your involvement with Cadmus. Enough to put you away for good. I have also devised a method of knowing exactly where you are at all times. So you won’t be able to escape.”

Lillian narrows her eyes, but her expression remains neutral. 

“You know I’m not joking, Mother. Someone made me realise recently that you’ve been undermining me all these years because you know exactly what I am capable of. That I am smarter than you and Lex. And that enrages you.”

“Fine. What do you want in exchange for your silence?”

“3 things. One, close down Cadmus for good. Two, no more attacks on Supergirl and Superman - or any alien for that matter. Three, don’t contact me ever again. From this day forward, I am no longer your daughter.” Lena keeps her voice steady, and prays that the tremble she is feeling in her throat does not show. “Before you try anything, I have in my pocket Lex’s Elimination protocol. You know what that does. So, please, just leave quietly.”

Composure gone, Lillian spits, “Well, you were never good enough to be my daughter anyway.” She storms out of Lena’s office, and the young Luthor watches her mother walk out of her life. Permanently. She sinks into her chair, relief and grief flooding her body. All her life, she had wanted so much for Lillian to love her like her own daughter. It had never happened, and even when she realised that the relationship had become toxic long ago, she had not stopped wishing. Now, she had taken matters into her own hands and disowned her mother. Now, she was free.

Kara flies into the office, still in her full Kryptonite armour, and hugs Lena. “She’s out of the building. I x-rayed her and she’s not carrying anything dangerous, nor is she communicating with any of her henchmen. It’s over.” Lena finally feels safe, and lets herself break down in Kara’s arms. 

Kara strokes Lena’s hair as she cries. She knows she is crossing another friendship boundary, but she can’t stand watching Lena in pain without doing what she can to comfort her. When Lena starts to calm down, Kara holds Lena at arm’s length, and looks into her eyes. “Lillian got it the other way round, by the way. She was never good enough to be your mother. To deserve to have someone as kind and wonderful as you in her life.” 

“Thank you,” Lena whispers, looking as vulnerable as a little girl. “Can you hold me for a while more?”

“Of course,” Kara replies, her heart breaking as she sees the pain in Lena’s eyes. She holds Lena as tightly as she dares. They stay like this for a long, long time.

That night, Kara stays over at Lena’s apartment. She has done so many times, but tonight is the first time that Lena wordlessly climbs in with Kara on the couch when Kara refuses to go to Lena’s bed. They spend the night talking and drifting in and out of sleep, Lena opening up to Kara about her childhood, how Lillian treated her, shamed her and forced her to hide her attraction towards women, how miserable their dysfunctional mother-daughter relationship has been making her all these years. The relief and sense of loss she feels now that it is all over. Kara dries her tears, holds her, listens attentively, prompts Lena when she feels Lena has the emotional strength to share more.

When Lena finally falls into an exhausted, deep sleep, Kara looks adoringly at Lena’s face, always kind, but free of pain and self-doubt only in sleep. Her lips are curled up in a small smile that emanates pure joy. She picks Lena up, and her heart squeezes when Lena holds on more tightly to her in her sleep, buries her face in Kara’s chest. She places Lena on her bed, then tries to detach herself without waking her. Lena frowns in her sleep and pulls her in still more tightly. Kara caves in and lies down, falling asleep in seconds.

The next morning when Lena wakes up, she thinks she is still dreaming when she sees Kara sleeping next to her in bed. The Kryptonian’s face is free of worry only in sleep, the weight of the world temporarily lifted off her strong, compassionate shoulders. There is also a look of pure bliss on her face. Everyone may call her Sunny Danvers, but when Kara thinks no one is looking, her face carries the quiet sorrow of losing her entire world, and the fear of it happening again with her chosen family. This look is absent now, as her beloved alien rests. Lena carefully pulls the blanket around her and gets up to make enough breakfast to feed five men.

* * *

“Let’s take a walk after breakfast, shall we?” 

“Can I have five more pancakes first?” Kara says thickly, her mouth full.

“By all means, make it a solid 20,” Lena smirks and waves her hand generously over the pancakes.

“It’s not my fault you’re such a good cook. And hey, I burnt a lot of calories worrying about you last night even though there was no action. And that Kryptonite armour is HEAVY,” Kara whines dramatically.

“I’m just teasing. You know I love your appetite,” Lena grins indulgently, her eyes affectionate.

When Kara is full (at least, for the next two hours), they go to a park near CatCo. To Lena’s relief, Kara is so focused on listening to Lena on the walk here that she hasn’t noticed anything out of the ordinary. It still surprises and delights Lena to this day that no matter what Lena is talking about, Kara always devotes her full attention. She marvels at how Kara is able to do that even though she’s on sensory overload all the time with her super-hearing. Lena smiles to herself in satisfaction whenever she sees CatCo, happy that her instructions have been carried out to the T. Lena chooses the perfect bench to sit in, with Kara’s back facing CatCo.

“Kara, I have to tell you something.” Lena says, her expression all serious.

“Sure, what is it? Are you okay?” Kara looks worried.

“Yes, don’t worry. Can I hold your hand?” 

Kara immediately puts her hand in Lena’s.

“I want you to know that when I bought CatCo, the real reason why I did it was to make you smile again, because you were heartbroken when Mon-El had to leave. 

I bought out all the florists in National City to fill your office, not just out of gratitude, but because I wanted you to feel exactly how I feel every time I see you. I was already useless around you back then,” Lena chuckles self-consciously, and Kara squeezes her hand reassuringly, her blue eyes already reddening.

“I still mean every word I said back then. You, Kara Danvers, are my hero. More so than Supergirl.” Lena takes a breath. Somehow this feels more scary than disowning her mother. “I think you’ve been able to sense how I feel about you for a while now, and unless I’m sorely mistaken, you feel the same way as well. I’m sorry I waited so long to tell you. I had to make sure my heart was mine to give once again. That l could keep you safe from Lillian - always. So…” Lena motions for Kara to turn around. Kara faces CatCo and her jaw falls. There is an enormous banner hanging on it that spans 20 storeys and reads, KARA DANVERS, WILL YOU BE MINE?

Kara turns around to face Lena, looking deep into emerald eyes. “Before I give my answer, I have a speech prepared for you too. You beat me to it.” She looks down, blushing furiously. Takes a breath.

“On Jack’s death anniversary, you asked me how you knew I needed you. I didn’t tell you the full answer then. It’s because I’m always tuned to your heartbeat and the sound of any distress from you. I trained myself to continually focus on you above all of the other noise from the city, because I love how it makes me feel close to you at all times. I realise that it sounds stalker-ish, but considering that I’m your best friend I hope you’ll find it sweet instead.” Kara gives a shy smile.

Lena nods, voice too choked up to speak, eyes glistening with tears.

“But you - somehow, without superpowers - you always know when I need you. Like after the festival of forgiveness. You are amazing, Lena. Your kindness, your intellect, your strength, your beauty, just - everything about you, except kale - leaves me _breathless_.

I’ve wanted to tell you that I love you, as more than a friend, for so long now, but somehow what comes out of my mouth is things like, ‘I’ll always protect you’ and ‘I’ll always be here for you’. Now, I want to make my intentions abundantly clear. In my culture, this is how we do it.”

Kara takes out her mother’s necklace from her pocket, and fixes it around Lena’s neck.

Lena knows what the gesture means, clutches it as tears stream down her eyes. “Now that I finally have my whole heart to give to you, and the courage to surrender it wholeheartedly, without fear...Lena Luthor - will you be my girlfriend?”

Lena strokes Kara’s cheek tenderly. “Yes. But no fair, I asked you first and you haven’t answered,” Lena smiles teasingly, and Kara’s heart melts at how happy Lena looks. _This incredible woman is finally mine._

“Yes, and always,” Kara giggles. “Now, can I kiss you?” 

They say that anticipation is always better than the outcome, but both find that it is not true in this case.

The butterflies high-five each other for a job well done, then return to their hosts’ stomachs to reside forever, dancing synchronously each time Kara and Lena’s eyes meet. 

The new couple walks back to Lena’s apartment, hand in hand, leaning into each other.

That night, as they are cuddling while watching movies, Kara’s phone buzzes. She thinks it is another teasing text from Alex or Maggie, but groans when she sees Snapper’s name.

**Congratulations, ponytail. I expect to see your first-hand exclusive account on my desk, complete with quotes from Miss Luthor (yes, it was that obvious), first thing tomorrow morning.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, you guys. This was a long one! Hope you liked it. I may not be posting again for a while, perhaps till season 5 is out, when no doubt I will feel the urge to fix episodes and commiserate with my fellow shippers. I’m hoping the break will help me come up with newer, fresher ideas and ways of writing their fluff.
> 
> Let me know if the butterfly thing worked for you. Just something I decided to experiment with, keep it fresh.


	12. It’s Not a Good Gift if It’s Not Expensive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena’s friends and girlfriend stage an intervention, but it’s not about what she thinks.
> 
> Just a short one which randomly came to me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...I couldn’t stay away after all. Supercorp is a contagious disease, and I can’t stop reading/writing/looking for Instagram and Pinterest posts about them.

Lena curses when she reads her texts on the lift up to Kara’s apartment. She is horribly late for Game Night, and the gang are laying into her, asking her why she isn’t here yet and calling her Big-shot CEO. Even Kara stopped defending her half an hour ago. She wills the lift to move faster.

The sight that greets her when Kara opens the door is not the scene that is usually unfolding by this time - Kara, Alex, Maggie and Winn trash-talking each other at the climax of Monopoly while James, J’onn and Sam sip beers and shake their heads good-naturedly.

There is a huge white Intervention banner hanging on the wall, and from the way all of them are staring at her, there is no doubt that she’s the subject. The very, very late woman of the hour. Oh dear. It must be about her workaholism. Her cheeks flush with shame.

“Lena, this is an intervention,” Kara says gently, taking her by the hand and guiding her into her home. It’s definitely not a normal Game Night - only Alex, Sam and Kara are present.

“Is it because I work too much?” Lena asks sheepishly, not able to meet anyone’s gaze. “I’m so sorry I was late. There was a meeting that ran long, and then-”

Kara kisses her cheek. “No, darling, it’s about your binge spending.”

Lena feels a flash of indignation. “I do not-”

“Before you deny it,” Alex cuts in, “Kara accidentally saw your credit card statement when talking to Jess and it was more than a hundred grand! In a month, Lena! We know you’re a billionaire, but still! And Jess said your bills didn’t use to be this big a year ago, and she’s getting concerned too.”

“I make twice that much on some days...and! I don’t spend that much  _ every  _ month!” Lena exclaims, hating that she has let Alex’s motherly tone shame her. It’s her own money, she can do what she likes with it. Truthfully, she doesn’t quite remember her total expenditure per month because her credit card bills are all paid automatically and she just has Jess check them for any suspicious-looking transactions.

“I couldn’t help but notice that half of that money was spent on me. And another big chunk is on those expensive bottles of scotch and wine you bring to our game nights.” Kara is looking sheepish now, too. “Let’s not go to those fine dining restaurants anymore, Lena, the portions are tiny and I have to eat a lot to be full. I’m bankrupting you!”

“You’re not bankrupting me, Kara - I’ll have Jess show you how much money I make on a daily basis if it’ll appease you.”

Kara detects a sulky tone creeping into Lena’s voice now, and knows they have to tread carefully.

“That’s not necessary, darling. We know you’re spending within your means - at least, if it doesn’t keep increasing exponentially. We trust that you won’t let yourself get there. But our real concern is whether you’re spending so much because you’re unhappy about something?”

Lena softens a little. Her friends and girlfriend aren’t meddling in her right to spend - they’re doing this because they care. “It’s exactly the opposite. I’m happy! I’m dating you, and I have all these wonderful friends because of that. And it’s only right that I show my appreciation by giving all of you only the finest things.” Kara observes that Lena’s mouth is dangerously close to a pout now. She also suspects that Lena is thinking,  _ It’s not like I have anything else to offer. _

“But you know that we don’t love you because you can get us expensive things right?” Sam asks, her face uncharacteristically grave.

Lena’s face freezes, and an awkward silence hangs in the air as she thinks. She’s had money all her life. She doesn’t really think about how she spends it, though for certain things like clothes, she likes to make sure she’s getting her money’s worth in terms of quality. She had been more careful when LuthorCorp sank and when she built L-Corp from its ashes, had to cut back on the vintage scotch and her weakness for high fashion, but she had never really been worried, never had to scrimp and save because her trust fund was still...shall we say...fat. And if she were honest with herself, all her life, she tended to buy her friends expensive gifts, first, to see the smiles on their faces, and then because it became a little competition to see if she could outdo herself each time. Really, when you start on such a high, you’d only look like a miser if your gifts get smaller, right? She did admit, though, that it gets stressful, and she  _ was  _ running out of Michelin-star restaurants to take Kara to...

“Lena? Are you mad?” Kara’s worried voice took her out of her reverie.

“No, no...I was just thinking. I don’t know, actually. I never really thought about  _ why _ I spend so much on all of you. I just buy it if I think it’ll make you happy.” She chews her lip thoughtfully.

“Sweetheart, you work so hard every day and we know every dollar is hard-earned. We don’t want you to spend so much of your hard-earned money on us. Keep it for yourself. Buy more of those suits you love so much and that look so good on you!”

“Kara’s right. To be honest, I can’t really tell the difference between your $10,000 scotch and a normal one. But I didn’t have the heart to tell you and also, it must taste better, right, since it’s so expensive? I also figured that maybe you can’t drink the normal scotch anymore.” Alex shrugs.

Lena is too embarrassed to tell Alex that actually, she can’t remember what normal scotch tastes like anymore.

“And Ruby will like the books you get her just the same whether they’re a first edition or on sale on Amazon. As for me, you really should stop getting me those expensive necklaces and clothes in case your other employees accuse you of favouritism. I can buy my own clothes, you know, especially since you are paying me twice the market rate,” Sam chuckles.

“You deserve every cent - you have a terrible boss,” Lena deadpans.

“Nonsense,” Sam smacks Lena’s arm and pulls her into a hug.

“Most importantly, what we want you to know is that we love you no matter what. The gifts make us happy because we see your kindness and thought in them, not because of how much they cost. We don’t want you to think that money is the only thing you have to offer,” Alex adds.

“So, from now on, will you be our normal friend whom we love very much, instead of our insanely rich friend? Well, except for the occasional time when we need your...connections,” Sam asks, a mischievous twinkle in her eyes.

“And my normal and extremely lovable girlfriend,” Kara pulls Lena to her and kisses her on her forehead.

Lena is unable to speak, just nods because she has melted into a puddle of goo from Kara’s tender kiss and her friends’ overwhelming concern. Her heart feels like it’s stuffed with cotton candy.

* * *

Later that night, Lena and Kara are lying in each others’ arms when Lena asks suddenly, still thinking about the intervention, “But, babe, don’t you like it that I’m so...eager to please?” She sounds so vulnerable, and Kara almost begins to worry until she sees that Lena is biting her lip, and her eyes are smouldering. Classic Luthor seduction technique.

With an evil smile, Kara delivers the perfect comeback. “No, I do not. You deserve to be punished.”

Lena’s eyes bug out. “Ooh, someone’s been reading 50 Shades of Grey!” The thought of her goody-two-shoes girlfriend reading erotica makes Lena feel hot all over.

“Lena! You know I only read  _ quality literature _ .” Kara looks very offended, eyes wide with innocence. With her spectacles on, she looks every bit the dorky but sexy librarian.

Lena is almost convinced until Kara says with a smirk, "I'm no Christian Grey. You, on the other hand, with your lip-biting, would make the perfect Anastasia Steele."

Lena bites her lip again and, together with her piercing gaze, it produces a  _ certain _ effect on Kara. “Don’t bite your lip. You know what that does to me,” Kara tries to deadpan, but finds herself breathless towards the end of the sentence. 

Lena replies by pulling her body on top of Kara and kissing her hard and fast. With lots of tongue.

There are no more words after that.

Hours later, as they lie in bed spooning, sleepy but blissful, Lena decides that the best things in life are free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For a visual of Lena's smouldering eyes (or if you just miss Supercorp and need a pick-me-up), watch this video a genius fan created where it's just 2 mins of canon scenes where Lena looks at Kara, but in slow-mo. Esp. at 1:45. Hahaha totally effective and convincing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-rMlBCOVTdc
> 
> I re-watch it after gym sessions as a reward, it's that good. ;)


	13. It’s Not Going to Stop Haunting Me Until You’re In My Arms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“Nightmare about Krypton?” Alex murmurs, fighting to stay lucid._
> 
> _“Not this time,” Kara says with a shuddering sigh as she tries to stem the tears with deep breaths. “Lena...she...I dreamt that Lex finally succeeded in killing her. It felt so, so real, Alex. I could even smell her blood and feel the wetness of it as she died in my arms.”_
> 
> _As Kara flies home, her heart is still racing, the dream memory of Lena’s body going slack dripping ice-cold dread down her stomach. She feels like she needs to touch Lena, feel her realness, to replace that memory, convince her brain that Lena truly is fine._
> 
> _She changes direction and heads towards Lena’s apartment for the second time that night._

Alex sits bolt upright in bed when she hears two taps on her window, her DEO training kicking in as her entire body awakens in two seconds. Once her brain snaps to attention, she remembers what the two taps mean, and relaxes a little. 

“Sorry,” Kara mutters softly, sniffling as she climbs into bed, into Alex’s waiting arms.

Alex kisses her forehead, arms wrapped around her sister, exhaustion claiming her body again as the adrenaline wears off and her eyes drift shut.

“Nightmare about Krypton?” Alex murmurs, fighting to stay lucid.

“Not this time,” Kara says with a shuddering sigh as she tries to stem the tears with deep breaths.

Alex cracks open an eye. This is new. “What was it about, then?”

“Lena...she...I dreamt that Lex finally succeeded in killing her. It felt so, so real, Alex. I could even smell her blood and feel the wetness of it as she died in my arms.” Alex’s pajama top starts getting wet.

“Oh, Kara…” Alex tightens her grip and strokes Kara’s hair to calm her. “Don’t worry, okay? You can hear her heartbeat, right? She’s fine. It was just a dream.”

“Yeah, I know. I stopped by her place to check on her before I came. But I still couldn’t get back to sleep so I came to you. Sorry I woke you.” 

“Hey, you know I don’t mind.”

“Hey, Little Danvers. Nightmare?” Maggie lifts her head sleepily from the other side of Alex’s bed. Her hand reaches out and squeezes Kara’s.

“Yeah. But I’m fine now.” Kara flushes, feeling even more guilty now that she’s woken Maggie too and suddenly weirded out about being in bed with Alex and her girlfriend. She takes deep breaths and calms herself, then detaches herself from Alex, eyes on the floor. “I should go, let you two get back to sleep. Sorry again!”

Alex wants to protest, knows from experience that Kara needs to be held some more, but her body isn’t listening to her and she’s having trouble keeping her eyes open. “You sure? You can just spend the night here. I’ll hold you till you fall asleep.”

“We both will. Sandwich hug,” says Maggie with a smile.

“Yeah, I’m sure.” Kara gives a brave smile. “Thanks, you two.” She squeezes Alex’s and Maggie’s hands, her eyes full of gratitude and love for the two of them.

As Kara flies home, her heart is still racing, the dream memory of Lena’s body going slack dripping ice-cold dread down her stomach. She feels like she needs to touch Lena, feel her realness, to replace that memory, convince her brain that Lena truly is fine. Otherwise, she knows she is never going to get back to sleep, that she would lie awake in bed thinking of new ways to keep Lena safe. She changes direction and heads towards Lena’s apartment for the second time that night. On the way there, she is already thinking of ideas. Step up her patrols near L-Corp and Lena’s apartment to 20 times a day? Maybe she could get Clark to take a shift the next time he is in National City. Suggest new upgrades for Lena’s security system again? 

She is so deep in thought that her boots make a loud thud as she makes a harder landing than usual on Lena’s balcony, which is attached to her bedroom.

Lena’s eyes jerk open at the sound, and she sits up in bed, instinctively gathering her covers around her. National City’s most powerful CEO looks around her for the source of the thud, frightened, confused. 

“Oh, crap.” Kara taps on the reinforced bulletproof glass door of the balcony to get Lena’s attention, smiling sheepishly. Lena does a double take, then her shoulders relax as she strides over to open the door for Supergirl.

“Kara? Is everything okay? You look upset.”

Kara’s heart fills with tenderness. She’s given Lena a fright in the middle of the night but the first question she asks is whether _Kara_ is alright.

“Yes. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you. I just wanted to check on you.”

“Why? Did the DEO find out about some new assassination attempt from my mother or my brother again?” Lena pinches the bridge of her nose, her shoulders sagging. She’s so sick of this.

“No, no...I just had a...a…nightmare.” Kara’s cheeks are aflame with shame, feeling childish.

“Oh, Kara. Come here.” When Kara dares to look up, still feeling embarrassed, she finds that Lena’s eyes are full of nothing but affection and concern. Kara steps into Lena’s hug, and, as she breathes in her scent, Kara feels as though nothing bad can ever happen when she is in Lena’s arms. Finally, her own heart begins slowing down and her mind stops racing, stops replaying horrific scenes from the nightmare, stops thinking of ways to keep Lena safe.

“Thanks. I’m fine now. I should go and let you get back to sleep.”

 _20 seconds of insane courage._ Lena is not sure why this line from the movie We Bought a Zoo randomly flashes like a neon sign in her mind at that exact moment, on that random Tuesday at 2am. Bravery surges around her heart, and she decides that she has danced around her best friend for long enough and it is time to cross a boundary, no matter what her risk-averse heart and overthinking brain has been telling her. “Nonsense. You’re clearly still upset and I don’t want you to fly home in this state. Stay with me tonight.” Her tone starts out firm, but the “stay with me” part ends up sounding more like a request. 

To her surprise, Kara nods as she wipes away the last of her tears, her face like a scared little girl, all resolve having left her body two sobs ago. Lena stumbles towards her walk-in wardrobe, her body still half-asleep, and passes Kara her favourite sweater that actually belongs to Lena and a pair of sweatpants that Kara left behind the last time she stayed over. 

Kara changes out of the supersuit at superspeed and stands awkwardly next to Lena’s bed, arms folded, eyes down, as though regretting her decision to stay and impose on Lena. They've never shared a bed before - even during actual sleepovers, Kara always insists on sleeping on the couch, telling Lena she's a disruptive bedfellow when really, she just does not think she can control her constant urge to kiss Lena if they are in bed together.

Lena takes Kara’s hand, her thumb stroking soothing circles around the blonde’s hand, and pulls Supergirl with her as she climbs into bed.

They lie down facing each other, still holding hands, just gazing. Dust motes float in the air between them and Kara feels her world lurch and spin slower. Overwhelmed by the intensity of the emotion spreading outwards from her heart to the rest of her body, like blood blooming from a bullet wound, Kara breaks eye contact first and looks down. She is suddenly bashful because Lena is so stunning that it hurts to look at her. 

Lena’s voice breaks the silence. “Do you get nightmares about me often?”

“Yes. Ever since the first time you got attacked, actually. Usually I’m okay after I check on you and see that you’re fine, but today’s was just really, _really_ bad, and even talking to Alex wasn’t enough to fully calm me down. It was _so real_ , Lena, and _I can’t lose you._ ” Kara’s voice cracks. Lena pulls Kara to her, whispers in her ear, “I love that you are my protector, but I hate that it makes you so worried that you can’t rest properly. I’m right here, my sweet Kara. I’m fine. It was just a dream. I’m _safe_ , and I always will be, because of you.” Kara shivers with every syllable that falls forth from Lena’s pillowy-soft lips.

Kara pulls Lena even closer in reply, and finally starts to breathe easy for the first time in hours. Lena continues to murmur comforting words in Kara’s ear, her words a lullaby, and she doesn’t stop, fights her exhausted body until Kara falls asleep in her arms. The last thought Lena has before sleep claims her is that now, she finally knows how precious Kara looks when she’s asleep. 

In the morning, the two will wake up to find their bodies still entangled, Lena’s face nestled in Kara’s chest. When Lena wakes up, it will be Kara’s turn to use her 20 seconds of insane courage, and spill out the rambling speech she has been swallowing back for months now. How, ever since their first meeting, Kara has known that her life would forever be split into Before Lena and After Lena. How she makes up increasingly ludicrous reasons to interview the kind-hearted Luthor. How every day that she doesn’t get to see Lena is considered a bad day. How she reschedules game nights whenever Lena can’t make it, and pretends that there were other reasons for doing so. How she is already patrolling L-Corp and Lena’s apartment 15 times a day but it doesn’t feel like enough because she _can’t breathe_ when she thinks about Lena in danger, or in pain. How, After Lena, every word in every love song has struck her heart like a raindrop splintering as it hits the ground because finally, finally she knows _exactly what they are talking about_. 

They will share an earth-shattering first kiss and feel a sense of deja vu, as though they have done this before. In each alternate universe. In so many chapters, in so many stories dreamt up by so many clairvoyants.

But, for now, our heroes sleep, arms wrapped around each other, both dreaming of a life where they never have to let go. 

They are about to find out that this life is about to begin.


	14. It’s Not Too Much If It Means I Get to Protect You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Normally, Kara wouldn’t have taken a second look at the sheaf of papers filled with numbers, but something catches her eye. S-112. That was the code-name that Lena had given her latest Supersuit. She remembered it because it happened to be the date of their anniversary. According to the numbers, S-112 had cost L-Corp almost a million dollars._
> 
> _Kara gasps and flips through the papers at superspeed to check how much the other suit upgrades had caused. They ranged from a hundred grand to 1.5 million. She carefully replaces the papers on her colleague’s desk and texts Lena, “Coming by your office.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Supercorp October!

“Ready for lunch, darling?” Kara peeks in at Lena’s temporary lab at the DEO with a big grin.

“Yes, but you gotta try this on first, babe,” Lena hands over what looks to be a new supersuit.

“Another one? That makes three this month. Lena, are you sure you’re getting enough rest between making me new suits and doing research for the DEO?” Kara tries to narrow her eyes sternly, but the effect on Lena is lost because she just looks like a puppy who is trying to suss out where its owner is hiding the treats.

“I am! Try it on, please? I’m so excited.”

Kara can’t say no to that lip-bite. “Okay. Thanks. I appreciate it, as always, but you’re looking thinner and more tired these days so I worry.” Lena strokes Kara’s cheek. “I’m fine, darling.”

Kara is unconvinced but decides to leave this conversation for later because she’s  _ starving _ . She changes at superspeed and does a slow 360-degree spin under her girlfriend’s admiring gaze. Even after years of dating, Lena’s eyes have never lost that look of hunger whenever she sees Kara, especially in the suit. 

“So what’s the upgrade that my genius of a girlfriend has come up with this time?”   
“When the suit detects that you have an opponent that is as strong as you, it discharges a lot of power temporarily to make you stronger. Just like an electric bike, it lends power to the force you exert.”

“Wow. You really are Supergirl’s protector.” Kara kisses Lena on the lips. “Thanks, babe. I’ll try it out at the simulation room after lunch.”

Lena smiles, her eyes soft as she looks up at Kara and holds her chin affectionately. “Anything to keep my hero safe.”

Kara kisses her again. “Now, let’s go for lunch.”

***

A week later, Kara accidentally comes across L-Corp’s financial statements on her colleague’s table. When the news about her and Lena dating broke, Snapper assigned her colleague to do all L-Corp stories to avoid conflicts of interest. Normally, Kara wouldn’t have taken a second look at the sheaf of papers filled with numbers, but something catches her eye. S-112. That was the code-name that Lena had given her latest Supersuit. She remembered it because it happened to be the date of their anniversary. According to the numbers, S-112 had cost L-Corp almost a million dollars.

Kara gasps and flips through the papers at superspeed to check how much the other suit upgrades had caused. They ranged from a hundred grand to 1.5 million. She carefully replaces the papers on her colleague’s desk and texts Lena, “Coming by your office.”

Kara almost loses her resolve to confront Lena about the costly suit upgrades when Lena greets Kara with a long hug and a lingering kiss. “I missed you,” Lena breathes into her ear while hugging her.  _ She must be having a bad day. _ But this conversation can’t wait - she doesn’t want Lena to sink any more money into this when she could use it to bring L-Corp to greater heights. Kara just has to approach the topic very gently.

She sits Lena down and takes both of her hands, explains how she came across the statements and what she found.

Lena looks a little sheepish, but her mouth is set in that stubborn manner of hers.

Kara strokes Lena’s hand to try to relax her. “Lena, you don’t have to spend so much money and time on my suits. You won’t be able to make it back.”

“Well, you never know. I could apply them to...uh...other...L-Corp products.”

“But who would you sell them to? Clark and I are the only Kryptonians on Earth. And you’ve been giving your tech to us for free.”

“Okay, fine, you got me there.” Seeing that Lena’s mouth looks dangerously close to a pout, Kara cups the brunette’s face in her hand.

“What’s wrong, darling? What’s driving you to spend so much on my suits?”   
Lena leans into Kara’s touch, raises her hand to cover Kara’s and looks deep into her eyes. She sighs. “I get nightmares about you dying. The fight with Red Daughter very nearly killed you, and I haven’t been able to sleep well since. When I can’t sleep, I get up and think about how to protect you better. Every little upgrade has helped me to sleep more peacefully.”

Kara’s eyes redden, and she pulls Lena into a tight embrace. “Why didn’t you tell me this earlier? No wonder I’ve been seeing you up and working late at night more often recently.” Kara dips her head. “I’m sorry...I didn’t realise that me being Supergirl worried you this much. I should have paid more attention, put myself in your shoes.”

“Hey.” Lena plants a warm kiss on Kara’s cheek. ”I didn’t tell you because I knew you would be upset that you being Supergirl makes me this anxious. Knowing this doesn’t help you. It’s not your fault for wanting to save people, Kara. As your girlfriend it is only sustainable if I find a way to deal with the inevitable anxiety, and this is a healthy outlet for me. And I really am starting to get used to it. I’m sleeping better. Especially when I’m in your arms,” Lena’s cheeks redden. “I really don’t care about all that money. Let me spend it to keep you safe, okay? Please, Kara.” Kara returns Lena’s loving gaze, feels her resolve weakening.

“And anyway, I think I’ve already eliminated every weakness you have on Earth with the upgrades I’ve added. I’ve explored every way to make you even more powerful. So the upgrades from here on will be a lot cheaper because they won’t require technology that hasn’t been invented yet.”

“You invented your own technology just to protect me?” Kara’s eyes grow dark with emotion...and desire. She’s always found Lena’s intellect incredibly hot. Their chess games are always full of...intermissions.

“Well, I...yes, basically. But it’s not as hard as it sounds.” 

“That’s because my girlfriend is a genius.” Kara squeezes Lena’s hand affectionately. Her voice takes on a serious tone again. “Okay, you’ve convinced me about the money, but will you promise me that you will wake me up when you have nightmares, instead of getting up to work on my suit? You’ve said yourself that it’s near perfection so waking me up so that I can hug you to sleep would be a lot more effective.”

“But..”

“No buts. I don’t need as much sleep as humans and I can fall back asleep very quickly, so you don’t need to worry. Plus, you’re there for me when I have nightmares so it’s not fair if you don’t tell me about yours.” 

Lena knows that when Kara’s jaw is set in the way it currently is, it’s checkmate.

“Okay.”

“Now, cancel your next appointment. You got me all hot and bothered by telling me you invented new technology to keep me safe, so now you’ve got to fix this.” 

The naughty smirk on Kara’s face leaves no room for doubt as to what she has in mind.

As it happens, Lena finds Kara irresistible when she’s being all bossy. 

As Lena tells Jess to clear her schedule, she silently congratulates herself on brain cells and money well spent. Kara is worth every cent, of course, but her desire for Lena when she’s reminded of her impressive IQ? Priceless.


	15. It’s Not Something She Did

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena’s secret best friend (spoiler: it's not Sam) shows up with a surprise proposition.

Lena is feeling excited for the first time in weeks. She surprises herself by actually feeling motivated to get dressed. It’s the first time since Lex set off the emotional bomb that detonated her and Kara’s friendship. She is meeting her other best friend, Alice Cullen, the one secret she had kept from Kara because it wasn’t hers to tell.  _ Well, take that. I have a secret too, _ Lena thinks with half-hearted vengeance. Anyway, Lena hadn’t had the chance to introduce Alice to Kara as the perfectly normal though smoking-hot human being she appears to be, because Alice had been travelling even more than usual for the past few years. Lena hadn’t seen Alice for two years - the longest they’d gone without meeting in person. They spoke on the phone every week. 

The night before, Lena had called her in the middle of the night and told her everything, because the pain had been unbearable, and Alice had run to National City all the way from Hungary, to see her.

Alice gives Lena a bear hug when they meet, and Lena chuckles, the feeling injecting a much-needed whoosh of relief and endorphins into her system. She forgot how strong Alice is despite how petite she looks. Her thoughts turn wistful as the image of another world-class hugger enters her mind. 

The two friends are catching up over dinner in an expensive restaurant in the next town. Alice whizzes them both there in a matter of minutes. Lena can’t help but wonder if Supergirl would be this fast, too.

Once the orders are taken, Alice clasps both of Lena’s hands, her eyes full of affection and concern. “How’re you holding up?”

As they eat, Alice makes Lena tell her the whole history of her and Kara’s friendship, how Lex had shattered it in the worst possible way, how Kara had lied to her for years about who she really was. She reveals “all the gross details,” per the vampire’s request - even the fact that she had hoped to be more than friends with Kara.

When, at the third course, Alice sees that Lena is just pushing around her food, Alice pays and says, “I’m taking you home. And I’m staying the night.” 

“No, you’re not. You’re supposed to be on honeymoon with Jasper!”

“No buts. He doesn’t mind, he’s worried about you too, it’s our tenth honeymoon, and I literally have forever to make it up to him.”

Lena clamps her mouth shut, knowing better than to argue with someone who has had centuries of experience. And she had really, really missed Alice, especially since she was no longer getting regular heavy doses of love, hugs and warmth from Kara. Cold turkey sucked big time.

At Lena’s apartment, Alice props her elbow up when they’re freshly showered and comfy on Lena’s bed, and asks, “Do you want me to do my thing?”

Lena bites her lip, deep in thought. Alice had the ability to see possible futures. In fact, one of Alice’s readings had been the reason why she made the decision to move to National City. It had been the lowest point in her life before this one, when her formerly beloved brother was making regular attempts on her life and she suspected that her mother was actually helping him. The Luthor name and fortune were both in tatters. She was desperately lonely, scared, and had no one to trust except Alice. Alice’s family had been in the middle of an epic vampire war at the time, but she had dropped everything for a night and rushed to Lena’s side when Lena called one desperate night.

Lena still remembers the vision Alice had shown her. Her, in a house brimming with warmth and light that she later found out was Kara’s. Her, in this house, surrounded by loving people whose names she later learnt. James, Winn, Alex, J’onn, Maggie, Sam, Brainy, Nia. They were playing board games. Lena had scoffed at that point in the vision. Board games! The last time she had played one was when she was six years old, before Lillian channeled all her energies towards chess, because it was “at least productive”. Future Lena looked so soft, so happy, and the scene was so filled with a certain  _ tenderness _ , that she almost didn’t believe it could be her life. She didn’t allow herself to really believe it until Kara started inviting her to Game Night, and Lena experienced it all for herself. Scenes like the one in the vision unfolded every week. She could hardly believe it was all real. That life was shattered now, just like the photo hidden inside her drawer at L Corp, meant for the bin but never quite staying there.

Back in the present, Lena winces as beautiful memories of Game Night play in her mind. Against her better judgment, she allows herself to miss every single one of the people she had come to think of as her chosen family, especially the one who had sworn to always protect her.

Alice nudges Lena, interrupting her pity party. Lena remembers Alice’s question, and gives her answer. “Yes, I want to know. Even though your last vision led me here. If I hadn’t come here, I wouldn’t know what it feels like to have so many friends who care about me, I wouldn’t have met Kara, and it wouldn’t have hurt this much. But those were still the best experiences in my life. And I know you wouldn’t offer to show me if it was all bad news. I know you already looked into my futures when you hugged me earlier today.” Lena manages a playful smirk, defying the tears in her eyes. She takes a breath, for courage.

Alice smiles. “Guilty as charged.” She puts her hand gently on Lena’s forehead, and closes her golden eyes.

The vision plays. Lena had forgotten how vibrant the colours in Alice’s visions are. It magnifies every emotion Lena is feeling, like a rousing score to a breathtaking scene. 

The scene that is unfolding is so simple - mundane, even, to someone else, but reduces Present Lena to sobs. She sees Future Lena and Kara, holding hands openly, walking down the street. 

Present Lena can hear Future Lena’s thoughts, feel what Future Lena feels as the scene plays. Lena had liked girls for a long, long time - spent more time suppressing it than expressing it, but still. This is the first time she’s ever dared to be open about it. It’s all because of Kara. Kara, with her unblemished view of other people and of the world, with her shrugs and why-not’s and that darn cute smile that nobody says no to. Kara, who makes Lena want to be brave, want to keep Kara as close as possible, show her off to the world on her arm, tell them all that she is hers.  _ Hers.  _ It is the first time Lena has ever found the courage to be just Lena, not Lena Luthor, put her happiness above “protecting” the Luthor name. Every night, she thanks everything that led to this evolution and whispers apologies to all the girls she kept at arms' length, who had opened her heart bit by bit, whom she had kept under wraps like some deep dark secret, whom she had let down, who had taught her how to love better, who prepared her for Kara. She even thanks the ordeal they went through when Lex outed Kara as Supergirl, because it eventually made them stronger.

Hardly anyone stares anymore when they hold hands and walk on the streets, in their own bubble of bliss. There are occasional telltale flashes, but even those paparazzi photographers are only making half-hearted efforts now that Lena and Kara are regularly doing en-pointe, posed-but-candid-looking shots for James. CatCo gets every exclusive on National City’s hottest couple, and now, two years later, most of the other photographers have given up. The fact that Kara’s face is never in focus except in James’s shots drives them crazy.

Kara asks, “What’s wrong, baby?” She is looking with concern at Lena’s reddened eyes.

Lena stops, cups Kara’s face in her hands and kisses her deeply, right there and then in the middle of the street. She inhales Kara’s vanilla scent, and her heart fills with so much tenderness that she knows if she dies now, she will die happy. People detour around them, either stealing voyeuristic glances or passing right on by, uninterested. 

A light drizzle begins to fall. Kara grabs Lena’s hand and runs to the nearest shelter, pulling Lena ahead such that she gets under cover a few seconds earlier than the Kryptonian.

“Are you okay? Are you cold?” Kara asks, brushing off the little droplets from Lena’s hair and blouse, and starting to shrug her own coat off to put around Lena.

Lena puts her hand over Kara’s so that the reporter will keep her coat on. “I'm okay. Don’t worry, my overprotective sweetheart,” the Luthor teases, the big grin on her face telling Kara that she is secretly loving it.   
Kara smiles, but her eyes are still tight with concern. “Why were your eyes all red just now?” And then, more playfully, “And what was that kiss-in-the-middle-of-the-street for?”

“For being you.” Lena kisses her again, a feather-light peck on Kara’s cotton-candy lips. “I just had one of those moments where I’m just filled with thankfulness that I have you, darling.” 

It is Kara’s turn to be tearful. She holds Lena tight and whispers, “Me too, baby.”

The vision ends, and Alice holds Lena as she weeps. Intense emotions sweep over her body in waves. There are tears of joy, an immense sense of relief for what is going to happen. Wonder. Confusion about how on Earth they’re going to get to this happy place from the current state of devastation. Heartbreak for what is still happening, the grief that Lena still has to go through.

“What does Kara have to do to make this happen?” Lena asks, voice still thick with tears.

“The deciding factor wasn’t her actions, though it wasn’t for lack of trying.”

“What do you mean?”

“It wasn’t her, it was you.”

“What can I do?” Lena asks doubtfully.

“Forgive.”

As Alice holds Lena tight, she sees the other future, the one where Lena doesn’t forgive Kara, fade into blackness and disappear.

Because Lena has made her decision. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bet you weren't expecting Alice from Twilight to make an appearance!


	16. It's Not Just Me I'm Living For Anymore

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara and Lena go to ground zero after hearing the news of the novel coronavirus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long hiatus, you guys! And thank you for waiting. ^_^ 
> 
> For my girlfriend - my home.

When the news of the novel coronavirus (2019-nCoV) breaks, Lena and Kara are on the couch at their newly acquired apartment, in each others’ arms. They gaze at each other, and find the same expression of determination and concern on each other’s faces. Nothing needs to be said. Later on, Lena would often recall this moment with intense feeling. The way the amber light fell on Kara’s face, how concerned, kind, lovely, her wife looked. How...beautiful.

They get changed, and Kara drops Lena off at L-Corp with a hug and a kiss. The increased pressure Kara uses in their parting hug speaks volumes. Lena gives her wife’s hand a reassuring squeeze. 

Within a week, Lena has used her resources to set up a temporary, state-of-the-art lab as close to ground zero as possible. Within the same seven days, she has also made Kara custom-made biohazard garments and made significant progress in finding a reliable cure for the virus.

While Kara, now joined by The Flash, delivers resources door to door, going so fast her body is nothing but a blue blur, Lena works feverishly on the cure. 

On day 1, Lena video-calls Kara just after midnight. “Self-quarantine?” Kara looks pained, the telltale furrow in her brow deepening. By reflex, Lena wants to kiss it, but her wife is not in front of her - not physically, just virtually. Lena’s heart squeezes painfully.

“Yes, baby. I deem it a necessary measure since I am working on the virus all day, every day.”

Kara stands a little straighter, and Lena knows she is composing herself. “Okay. I trust your judgment. Anyway, I am in contact with the patients every day, so I am also worried about being a carrier and spreading it to you. Not that I have no faith in your equipment. But I just don’t want to take the risk, you know?”

“I understand completely. I’ll video call you at 9pm every day. Promise.”

“Okay. Be safe. Take care. Drink more water and  **try** to get enough sleep. I love you.” Kara presses her lips to the screen, and Lena does the same. Inside, her heart gives another painful squeeze as she wonders how long it will be until she can feel Kara’s lips on her forehead, cheeks, lips again - and feel that reassuring, life-affirming sensation that sweeps through her with every touch from her wife.

She casts the negative thoughts aside, clears her head. The fastest way to see Kara again is to get that cure.

A week later, Lena’s confidence is flagging. She is exhausted, having slept only three hours every day, while sticking to her promised 1-hour video call at 9pm every day. Kara keeps sending her vitamins, and she keeps taking them, but she knows she needs to rest. The fatigue is also messing with her mind.  _ Why haven’t you found the cure yet? You’re a fraud. There’s no other explanation. _ She beats herself up with every failed experiment. There is a voice in her head, a voice that sounds like Kara’s, which deflects such thoughts.  _ Just keep going. You’re so close. You’ll find the cure soon. You’ll see. _ But with her increasing fatigue, this voice of light is weakening.

One night, at 3am, after yet another failed experiment, Lena finds herself close to breaking point as she tunes into the news. The death toll has risen yet again, and there is mass panic in the most affected areas, leading to a shortage of resources like surgical masks and food due to hoarding by the most panicked and affluent citizens. 

Kara responds immediately, getting TV networks to broadcast a recording of her delivering a rousing speech of being stronger together. 

Lena stares at the vial of nCoV that she has been experimenting with. She knows she is very close to a cure, that she just needs to unravel a few final missing links. If exposed herself to the virus, she would gain an intimate knowledge of it, and she feels confident that she can find the cure before she succumbs to the disease. The idea is very tempting, an excellent way to silence the trash-talker in her head. 

Kara’s voice appears in her head, asks her to sleep on it. She obeys, mostly because she misses her wife intensely.

When Lena awakes from her makeshift bed in the lab, she sees a sea of white. Paranoid at first that her vision has failed her due to overwork, she closes her eyes and opens them again. The sea of white morphs into a gigantic bouquet of plumerias - her favourite flower. There is a note.

“My dearest wife,

My heart breaks, imagining the fatigue you must be feeling right now. Press on, my love. I have absolute faith that you will find the cure to this terrible disease. 

I grew this plumerias myself, in a glasshouse I had built in the Fortress of Solitude. I love looking at flowers thriving in the harsh subzero temperatures there. Life finds a way. As will you, baby. Have faith, as I do in you.

Today was the first day I met you, in your office at L-Corp. Happy meet-a-versary, my darling wife. We will see each other soon. I am counting down every minute.”

Lena stares at the vial of nCoV again, this time with tears in her eyes. Kara’s loving note has reminded her of the stakes. Lena isn’t living just for herself anymore. If things go south after Lena injects herself with the virus, Kara wouldn’t be able to carry on without her, would find some absurd way to blame herself for not being able to protect her.

Lena begins a new round of experiments with renewed vigour. She finds the cure, two days later. But her elation is nothing compared to the moment, another day later, when she and Kara are reunited.

Kara lands in Lena’s lab, looking exhausted. She falls into Lena’s waiting arms. Kara has been spending the day administering the cure at hospitals, since Lena has ascertained that the virus does not affect Kryptonians.

They couldn’t be more proud of each other.

A month later, when WHO declares that the situation is firmly contained, they return to their apartment. They do not realise how homesick they are until they open the door, and look at each other with tears in their eyes, hands so tightly clasped, it is as though they are never letting go again.

They head straight for bed, cuddling each other with gentle fierceness. Touching, loving, with the same intensity. Before exhaustion claims them, they each think, in their hearts, how the greatest reward is for them to return home - here, to each other’s arms. They sleep soundly, bodies intertwined, heroes taking a well-deserved rest, at last. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are in one of the affected countries, hang in there and all the best! Let's all be socially responsible and rational, take precautionary measures where necessary. We will survive - humans always do.


	17. It's Not A Lockdown In All Ways of the Word

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara devises a way to be together with Lena - at a safe distance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone's staying safe and healthy!  
> No spoilers in the comments please ;) - I haven't had time to watch S5.

**Kara:** It’s been 60 days!!!

 **Alex:** Yes, Kara, you update me every single day. And as I have told you for the past 59 days, multiple times each day - the risk of you infecting her has **not** decreased. If you want to risk it, be my guest.

Kara pouts and scowls at her phone. She can’t go another day without touching Lena. It sounds wrong, but all the video calls in the world don’t substitute for the feeling of being in Lena’s arms, and letting the Luthor’s even breathing lull her to sleep, keep the anxiety and nightmares at bay.

Well...time for video call number 5 then. It’s only 11am, but what the heck.

“Hey baby, I miss you,” Lena answers on the first ring. The pale-skinned woman’s frazzled face lights up once Kara’s image loads up on the screen.

“I miss you too darling.” Kara pouts. “Alex says it’s still not safe for me to come see you, even if it’s just for five minutes.”

Lena’s face falls a little. “Yeah, I know that. But I keep wishing too. Anyway, it’s not worth the media backlash. I can already see the headlines: ‘Supergirl Flouts Lockdown Rules for Booty Call’.” She rolls her eyes.

“Booty call, huh?” Kara teases.

Two spots of colour appear on Lena’s cheeks. “That’s the angle that the tabloids always go with,” she retorts.

“So you _don’t_ want a booty call, then?” Kara can’t resist pretending to look hurt.

“Are you kidding? I’m ready to ravage you the moment the lockdown ends.” Lena bites her lip.

Kara’s pout deepens. “Hey! No revenge seduction!”

“I got your gifts, by the way,” Lena beams so bright that Kara can feel her delight warming her up through the screen.

Kara grins back. “I hope you like them.”

“You don’t have to send me a daily care package.”

“Nonsense. You deserve _everything_.”

Lena blushes. “You’re the best.” Jess appears onscreen with an apologetic smile and wave, and Lena’s happy face immediately clouds with guilt. “Sorry, I have to go, babe, I’m late for my next conference call and looking at you is just making it worse. You may have to do an actual booty call.”

Kara presses her lips to the camera, and sighs after Lena does the same and ends the call. She allows herself another minute of self-pity. She knows it’s a first world problem, but she can’t help feeling that she would gladly give up all of her superpowers just to see her girlfriend in the flesh. 

She makes herself a heavenly cup of earl grey tea to soothe herself, then launches into the night, flying until darkness becomes light, to help the capeless heroes on the other side of the world. These days, she literally works round the clock, with a few Lena-enforced breaks. 

Seeing the healthcare workers’ courage and determination amidst immense stress and overwork gives her perspective on her problems, but also makes her very depressed. She wishes she could do more to help.

After a 12-hour shift making ventilators in super-speed, Lena calls her. It’s nearly bedtime, and Lena, seeing the shadows underneath her girlfriend’s eyes, chides, “You’re not literally made of steel. Who are you going to help if you go to pieces?”

She flies to the Fortress of Solitude to decompress.

Again, she watches the holograms of Krypton exploding, reassures herself that it will not happen to her current home, then watches holograms of Krypton surviving the Argo Fever pandemic, which actually infected multiple planets. She reminds herself that she, too, fell ill, but came out of it just fine. Earth will, too. 

Kara smiles when her phone tinkles like a windchime - a special sound she’s assigned to the person who makes her feel light as air. 

**Lena ❤:** Stop watching videos of Krypton exploding! It won’t make you feel better.

 **Kara:** Oops. Going to watch puppy videos now.

But watching cute animals get into sticky situations feels like an insult to Krypton’s technology, so she searches the inventory records instead, trying to find equipment that could help with the pandemic. She’s already searched, but maybe she missed something...

There is nothing that helps with killing a stubborn virus, but she comes across a pair of powerful toys that give her an excellent idea.

Filled with renewed vigour, she goes to give Trump his daily flick on the forehead (she does it with super speed, so he’s never found out that it’s her), and is pleased that she got him just as he was about to fall asleep.

After a 12-hour shift at the busiest hospital in the world, Kara drops off one of the Kryptonian equipment at Lena’s house with a care package, a fresh bouquet of plumerias and a lovely note sprayed with her perfume (and sealed with a kiss, because all cliches are now precious). 

Lena comes home after an 18-hour day, barely able to keep her eyes open as she unlocks her door. She wakes up a little when she sees, on her dining table, her daily care package from Kara, next to a vase heaving with a different collection of plumerias from yesterday, and something that vaguely resembles one of her lab equipment.

She reads the note. “Today’s care package comes with something different. Have a good night’s sleep. I’ll call you at 10am tomorrow to tell you what to do. :) Sweet dreams, my love.”

As Lena lays on the bed later that night, she smiles with excitement at what surprise Kara has planned for her the next day. Then, sleep takes her by surprise, and she plummets into dreamland with her hair still damp.

At 10am the next day, Lena is still rubbing the sleep from her eyes when Kara calls her. 

Supergirl looks tired, too, but as excited as a kid eating ice-cream for the first time. “Good morning, my love! We are going on a date today.” 

“Really? How?!”

“Go get the gadget I gave you yesterday.”

“Okay...what is it?”

“You’ll see!!!”

It resembles a very futuristic biker’s helmet, only the visor is only half its usual length, and the helmet doesn’t quite cover the entire head. There is no cushion, either.

Kara shows Lena how to switch it on by doing the same on her own set. “Okay, sit down on the bed, then...put the helmet on…great!”

“Now, put down the phone, and think of the last Saturday morning we spent together.”

“Ok...I don’t see anything except my ceiling.” Lena is starting to feel silly, wearing a helmet in bed.

Kara giggles. “Turn to your right.”

Lena exclaims as Kara materialises next to her on the bed, says, “Good morning, my love,” and kisses Lena on her forehead. 

“What sorcery is this?!”

“Think of it as a VR headset on steroids.” Present Kara explains. “It plays out a scene from your memory exactly as you remember it, complete with input from all six senses.”

“That’s amazing.”

In the memory, Lena is hugging Kara and returning her good morning kiss, and Present Lena can feel every sensation. “It’s super realistic,” Present Lena breathes. 

Past Lena gets up from the bed and goes into the kitchen. Present Lena feels goosebumps. “I’m following myself now. It’s like an out-of-body experience.”

“If you tap the button on the right twice, it switches to the first-person view.”

“Ah! Much better.”

Lena makes coffee for two. As the espresso machine hums into life, the whole kitchen fills with the aroma of freshly-brewed coffee. It is almost as intoxicating as the woman who hasn’t been with her for two months, who is somehow right here in the flesh, hugging her from behind as she attempts to steam the milk perfectly. Lena’s love for technology increases tenfold, right there and then.

Present Lena feels a swell of affection as Past Lena takes out the jar of special sugar she created in the lab - customised for Kara so that she only experiences the sugar high and not the crash. Present Lena hadn’t opened that jar for two months, and the sight of it fills her with longing.

They clink mugs, take a sip of coffee and emit simultaneous sighs of pleasure.

After coffee and a crazy number of croissants, Kara pulls her back into bed, a telltale playful smirk on her face. 

Making out with Kara has always been a wondrous experience, but after two months of deprivation, it feels otherworldly. Lena savours every sensation - Kara’s come-hither smile, her ardent lips, her arms pinning Lena down, fingers exploring, caressing, loving. She trembles with every caress, moans as Kara’s tongue teases her breasts. Kara’s body feels glorious, pillowy-soft in some areas and rock-hard in the right places.

After, Lena sighs contentedly as she feels the immense comfort of Kara’s warm arms encircling hers. Present Lena realises that she hasn’t felt this safe in two months. Past Lena falls asleep contentedly in Kara’s arms, and Present Lena sees the screen on the helmet go dark.

Lena is still glowing with bliss as she takes off the helmet. “Thanks baby, I really needed that. It was the best date ever, and you weren’t even here.” 

Kara winks at her, and gives an “aww-shucks” shrug.

They do this every day until the lockdown finally ends.

On the first night of their reunion, the exhausted superhero falls asleep in the midst of kissing Lena.

Lena sighs and shakes her head affectionately, tucks Kara in and plants a soft kiss on her forehead. Lena puts on the helmet and falls asleep to a memory of Kara’s arms encircling hers, protective even in sleep - the only way Lena has been able to fall into a restful sleep every night.


	18. It’s Not a Hallucination When You’re in Custom-Made Pyjamas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Something moves in the vicinity of Lena's face, making her feel even warmer. Curiosity forces open her reluctant eyes. As her sleep-addled brain focuses, she sees a logo that looks like an S, but represents an entire lost world._
> 
> _The last daughter of said lost world opens her eyes, too, and says, with an adorable sleepy smile, “Happy birthday, baby.”_
> 
> _Lena sees, in the dappled moonlight, Kara - in Supergirl pyjamas._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short one to put my insomnia to bed.

An almighty crack of thunder wakes Lena up with a start.

The soft symphony of rain hitting the pavement that follows, feels almost like an apology. Its hypnotic rhythm starts to pull Lena back into sleep’s warm embrace.

Warm. Hmm. Actually, she hadn’t been warm when she’d gone to bed. It was a brisk autumn’s night, and the cold sheets had made Lena miss her hot bedfellow more than ever. 

Something moves in the vicinity of her face, making her feel even warmer. Curiosity forces open her reluctant eyes. As her sleep-addled brain focuses, she sees a logo that looks like an S, but represents an entire lost world.

The last daughter of said lost world opens her eyes, too, and says, with an adorable sleepy smile, “Happy birthday, baby.”

Lena sees, in the dappled moonlight, Kara - in the Supergirl pyjamas Lena had had custom-made in the softest material money can buy, with a threadcount non-Luthors can only dream of. Kara had simply called it, “the stuff good dreams are made of”. High praise, coming from a chronic sufferer of nightmares about people she can only see again when she closes her eyes.

Involuntary tears flow on Lena’s face, and Kara thumbs them away, gently, with utmost concern. “What’s wrong, my love?”

“I missed you,” she breathes, her words almost drowned by lashings of determined rain.

As the storm outside gains momentum, Lena has never felt more cosy as Kara wraps her up in a strong, yet soft, embrace. Lena makes a mental note to tell Kara the tale of Goldilocks, to illustrate her perfect grasp of comfort.

“How?”

“Sleep, dear. I'll ‘xplain everythin...” Kara’s even breathing fills the air, and Lena marvels at how it makes a nocturne with the rain. 

She feels so _light,_ just knowing that her magical life with Kara has resumed. Before Lena surrenders to the gentle oblivion, she plants a feathery kiss on Kara’s forehead, thanking all the lucky stars in the universe, because there must be such a thing for the pandemic to end exactly on the day she turns 33. 

**Author's Note:**

> I intend to add on to this theme of Lena using her wealth/beautiful mind to spoil/apologise to Kara and Kara using her superpowers and sweetness to do the same for Lena, whenever inspiration smacks me hard enough. Ideas welcome :)
> 
> This fic is pretty much all fluff but if you like angst with a happy ending, check out my other works :) , e.g. my slow burn AU - https://archiveofourown.org/works/20053363


End file.
